I was washing my face last night dreading doing my nightly skin care routine. "I just want to watch cop shows" my thoughts were echoing. I wanted to hurry up and finish my rountine so I could rush back to watching my show. A thought flashed before my mind so quick I almost missed it "I remember when I simply enjoyed this process." Something had happened in the last week. I had fallen back into old patterns of thinking and behaviors that felt familiar but another part of myself wanted nothing to do with them. After my skin care routine came meditation--and that was the last thing I wanted to do. "I'm going to skip my meditation tonight and just resume tomorrow. I want to watch my show" Another thought followed, "Lol this is exactly why I need to just sit down and meditate. There's a reason I'm avoiding it" This back and forth went on for a while until I saw my feet walking to my closest where I usually meditate. I sat down cross legged on my beige pillow and set my timer on my phone to 15 mins. Okay here we go... With my eyes closed and my attention on my breathing, I become to count each inhale. 1 inhale, exhale... 2 inhale, exhale... 3 inhale, exhale... "Wow I love this, I don't know why I didn't want to be here" 4 inhale, exhale... Over and over. Then spirit hit me with a message about obedience, and I knew I had to listen. I realized I had slipped back—not because I didn't want my quantum leap, but because it terrified me. Everything was shifting so fast, exactly as I had intended, but my old self panicked. She crept back in, quietly, subtly—so much so that I didn’t even see her coming. And when I saw what was happening--I didn't freak out or punish her. I simply listened to her and held space while taking my attention back to the inhale and exhale. 5 inhale, exhale... 6 inhale, exhale... "I don't want to do this stupid stuff. I just want to watch my show. As soon as the timer goes off I am watching my shows" 7 inhale, exhale... 8 inhale, exhale...

Today I was able to sell my soaps to a business that’ll put them in their store! I’m so grateful for the exposure. They also invited me to do pop up events to sell some of my other products! I’m so excited 😆 lbs…

I finally hit studio after many months. Feeling good 2 be in element. 🏍️💨

I just want to express my appreciation for this challenge because it shed light on what I use to do but somehow lost my way. Breathing techniques, meditation, allowing my imagination to be present are all things that grew me into the person I am presently. So I'm grateful I was reminded of this during this challenge. I wanted to say this just in case I forgot. I really want to continue being mindful of the time and energy I spend on social media. Maybe not 15 minutes initially but I want to get there.

Life feels like a gift again. It feels like everything is gonna be alright.. and nothing in the external has changed. Which means there’s something within me that’s shifted and to me, that’s a win ☺️ I’m welcoming change and embracing the work. Which honestly, I thought I had been doing the work but still frustrated with my reality. Starting my morning pages and just being in communication with myself w/o the fear of what may come up b/c I know I’m equipped to overcome it. Grateful for a community to share those wins with! I am falling in love with life again ❤️