A Little MIA This Week & A Thought on 'Mind Fog'

Hi Superparents,

My apologies for being a bit quiet in here this week! It was a very active one behind the scenes. I was head-down on a big work project (working on bringing more resources to this very community!) and navigating some personal stuff.

It reminded me how easily we, as solo parents, can get trapped in the mist when so many things are happening at once.

I've noticed this with some of my clients, and I've certainly lived it myself: the everyday grind of solo parenting can be so all-consuming that self-care isn't just on the back burner, it's fallen completely off the stove. The co-parenting drama, school emails, bills, grocery lists, homework battles, work deadlines, and the ghosts of things you want to do... it all merges into a thick 'mind fog'. Before you know it, the kids are in bed, and you're just doom-scrolling on your phone, too mentally drained to do that one thing you promised yourself you'd do.

If that was you this week, please know: It's okay. That is a completely normal part of this journey.

But here's the thing: we often try to push through that fog alone. The idea of reaching out for help can feel like one more overwhelming task. We might feel embarrassed, like we're failing, or that we'll be a burden.

From a psychological perspective, this is often a learned behavior. There's a concept known as the 'buffering hypothesis' of social support. It suggests that strong social connections act as a protective buffer against the negative impacts of stress. However, if you've been exposed to a lot of drama or unreliable situations in the past (sound familiar?), your brain can get wired for hyper-independence as a survival mechanism. You unconsciously learn that it's "safer" or "easier" to just do it all yourself.

It's time to unlearn that. It's time to rewire.

Reaching out for help isn't a sign of weakness; it's a sign of strategic strength. Most people in our network are willing and often honored to help. You just have to take the leap and ask the question. You'll be surprised by the answer.

So, my challenge for all of us this week is two-fold:

Ask for It: What is ONE small thing you could ask for help with? (e.g., "Hey neighbor, could you grab my package?" or "Friend, can I just vent for 5 minutes?")
Offer It: How can you offer a small piece of support to another single parent in your life?

Let's use the comments to share our ideas for both. Let's make asking for help our collective superpower.

You're not in this alone.

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