Jul '24 • Challenges and Celebrations <3
Problems to Possibilities
Well friends, the opportunities to test out this nervous system stuff never end with this house experience! Last night I received an angry call from a neighbor, I had been told when I bought the house that her fence was 11 feet into "my" property and that I would need to work with her to move it. I had emailed her and hadn't heard back so had then called and left a message. She then called me later, super upset, telling me how angry she was with me and how she was going to call the police if I touched her fence! I was shocked! She kept referencing her lawyer's letter and when I finally got her calmed down, I was like, what letter are you talking about? She had emailed me twice with a whole bunch of information about how it is her property and that she would fight me and win and defend her property and all this stuff, but I had never received it. We tried sending new emails and still I didn't get any and then finally my nervous system calmed down enough for me to have the idea that I could check my spam folder and there they were. I read it through and it's a grey area for sure but I don't care enough to fight so I just said, ok, let's just let it go. I took care of myself last night with some gentle movement and reached out to some friends to connect about it and went to sleep still feeling a bit wary of her and the experience but relatively peacefully. Then this morning as I was journaling, I heard a knock at the door. It was the internet company saying they needed to dig an internet line in. I was like sure and went upstairs. Then I got a call and it was her again, super angry saying "your man is digging in my yard and I'm calling the police!" I was like, no, it's not "my man" and it is just the internet company and I didn't ask them to do that and I didn't know they were in your yard, so I went down and sure enough they were over there and I was like the neighbor is going to call the police and they were like, we don't need her permission and let her go ahead, and I was trying to navigate all of it and then she was like, I'm in a yoga class I have to go and hung up! WOAH! What a wild ride! I certainly reminded that any dream can be a nightmare and any nightmare can be a dream. This simulation is offering me up so many "problems" but thank goodness for my dear AB (accountability partner) who keeps reminding me to see the possibilities. So the possibility here is for me to continually offer up the fantasy that "everything will work out the way I want," to continually come back to letting go of the need for people, places and things to do what I think is best, to act in the way that I think is "right." This neighbor is my new teacher, and boy is her method effective! I sent her an email explaining the situation to the best of my ability, and I am noticing that my impulse was to stop her from calling the police, when really, I could let her do what is right for her and trust that I can experience having someone call the police on me, why should I not have that experience. Why should I not have any experience really. This game does not make sense, in it people do and experience all sorts of things, some "good" some "bad' and everything in between. Now I am going to go do some movement as I am definitely mobilized! Big hugs on this already very exciting Tuesday morning! xo, z
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Problems to Possibilities
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Learning to surf the waves of life in community, letting go of obligation and judgement and embracing the wisdom of our nervous system.
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