Why I Sometimes Dread the Weekend

Dec '25 • FIRE PIT

This recently came up in a text message exchange I had with

and it got me thinking. Sometimes I dread the weekend. Not because I do not love my family, but because the weekend breaks my structure. During the week I know who I am. I have a routine. I have a role. I produce. I provide. Quick dopamine hits. I feel useful.

Then the weekend shows up and that scaffolding disappears. I am no longer measured by output. I am measured by presence. And presence is harder for me than productivity. When things slow down, I notice how quickly I want to escape. Not physically, but mentally. I get irritated by small things. I look for something to manage or fix- usually my wife, and I miss the clarity of structure.

The Sabbath stops feeling like rest and starts feeling like exposure. It confronts how much of my sense of worth is still tied to usefulness. How much I trust my own structure more than God’s. How uncomfortable I am being seen without a role. I do not experience Sabbath first as relief. I experience it as resistance. And maybe that resistance is the point.

I am not writing this with an answer. I am writing it because Sabbath keeps showing me parts of myself I would rather avoid. God tells us to rest so that we leave our structure and enter His structure.

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