How much pain are you willing to suffer in order to get what you want

How much pain are you willing to suffer in order to get the life that you want?

Instead of asking what do I want in life, wouldn't it be better to ask how much pain am I willing to suffer in order to get what I want in life? It won't be easy getting the life that you want and far to many quit before they reach their goal because they never figured out how much they are willing to struggle and suffer to get to where they want to be. When I was an amateur boxer, I knew many boxers who hated roadwork, but they ran every day or every other day because they wanted to be the best. They knew how much suffering they were willing to suffer in order to be the best that they could be. What do you want out of life? How much pain and suffering are you willing to go through in order to get what you want?

Bear Warrior Gonzales

Let's take another look at the powerful question of “What do I want?” Goals in life aren’t just about desire; they’re about tolerance for discomfort, sacrifice, and persistence. Desire is easy; discipline and suffering separate dreamers from achievers.

When you recognize that everything meaningful carries a price, then the real question becomes: Are you willing to pay it?

The Cost of a Dream

Every pursuit has its hidden toll. Whether it’s the early mornings of training, the sting of rejection, the grind of building a business, or the long and lonely hours creating something that others don’t yet understand—it all costs something deeply personal.

The amateur boxers who didn’t didn’t love running in the drizzle or pounding their legs on unforgiving pavement. But they loved the result of what that suffering brought them: endurance, stamina, and advantage in the ring.

It’s the same in life: your willingness to suffer becomes your compass.

Relevant Quotes

“We must all suffer one of two things: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret.” — Jim Rohn

“If you are willing to suffer, you can do anything.” — Friedrich Nietzsche

“Discomfort is the currency of your dreams.” — Brooke Castillo

Thought-Provoking Questions

1.What difficulties am I currently avoiding that might actually be the gateway to my growth

2. Which pain would I rather face: the fatigue of persistence or the ache of regret?

3. If I knew success in my chosen path required me to suffer daily in a specific way, would it still be worth it to me?

4. Am I more afraid of suffering now, or of realizing later that I never gave myself fully to what I wanted?

Exercises to Try

1. Pain Inventory Exercise

Write down your top life goal (career, relationship, health, art—whatever it is).

Under it, list the specific pains, struggles, or discomforts you anticipate (e.g., waking up at 5 AM, facing rejection, sore muscles, financial instability).

Next to each, ask: Am I willing to pay this price again and again? If not, why?

2. The Two Lists Journal Prompt

Make two columns:

Compare: Which pain is heavier for your life—discipline now or regret later?

At the end of the day, the life you want isn’t “out there” waiting—it’s the byproduct of repeated sacrifices and struggles you’ve chosen to endure.

So let me ask you: What’s the one form of pain or struggle you already know you must embrace if you’re going to move closer to the life you say you want?

REMEMBER YOU CAN SUFFER NOW FOR AN EASIER LIFE LATER, OR YOU CAN LIVE AN EASY LIFE NOW AND SUFFER LATER. THE CHOICE IS YOURS AND YOURS ALONE.

Pain Tolerance Plan Framework

STEP 1: Clarify Your North Star

Write down your primary life goal (or the top 1–2).Example: “I want to build my own business and be financially independent within 5 years.”👉 Ask: Why does this matter so deeply to me?

STEP 2: List the Prices to Pay

Break the goal into pains/discomforts you'll inevitably face.For each, rate from 1–10 how willing you are to endure it.

Example (for fitness):

Early mornings (5/10)

Muscle soreness and fatigue (8/10)

Strict nutrition/dieting (6/10)

Missing social events or parties (7/10)

Now you clearly see where your limits and weaknesses lie.

STEP 3: Choose Your Non-Negotiables

Pick 2–3 struggles that you're willing to treat as mandatory, no excuses.This creates discipline anchors.

Example:

Run 3x/week (no matter how tired).

No alcohol during the workweek.

Daily journaling of progress.

These become your “roadwork” — the equivalent of the boxer’s runs that separate the committed from the casual.

STEP 4: Progressive Overload

Just like in training, you don’t take on all the pain at once. You increase your tolerance gradually.

Week 1–2: Commit to one discipline anchor.

Week 3–4: Add a second discomfort habit.

Month 2+: Expand or intensify.

This keeps you from quitting early due to overload.

STEP 5: Weekly Pain Reflection

Each week, journal answers to:

Which discomfort did I face head on?

2. Which discomfort did I avoid or excuse myself from?

3. Did this week’s struggle move me closer to my goal or just drain me?

4. How can I increase (or adjust) my tolerance next week?

STEP 6: Regret Check

Ask yourself often: If I quit now, will I regret not having chosen this pain later?This connects you to the greater why behind your suffering.

Suggested Exercises

"Three Hard Things" RuleEach day, deliberately face and complete 3 things you don’t want to do but know you must. (Workout, cold shower, difficult call, etc.) Over time, this builds your resilience muscle.

Mock Struggle DaysOnce a week, schedule a “controlled hardship” day (long workout, fasting, digital detox, or doing an unpleasant task). Training discomfort makes real-life struggles easier.

Closing Reflection

Success in anything isn’t about avoiding pain—it’s about choosing the pain that transforms you.

“Choose the pain of discipline over the pain of regret. One weighs ounces, the other tons.”

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