Here's a preview for your perusal and feedback. What's good, and what can be improved? Cinderella and the Fairy Oddfather: An Offer She Can’t Refuse (or Can She?) What Will She Do for a New Glass Shoe? A comedic twist on the classic tale, as adapted by John Andrew Lang and Kris Jim Murdock (Intended as a Christian allegory about discernment. Please do not disclose outside this group without permission.) Chapter 1: The Royal Invitation Work, toil, sweat! Work, toil, sweat! Never done, never good enough. Would it never end? Once upon a time, there was a girl named Ella who had no time to do anything except chores day in and day out for her stepsisters and stepmother, who never did any work themselves and never showed any appreciation for her help. She barely even had time to sleep at night. It had been that way ever since her father’s death. Without him around to stand up for her, the stepmother and stepsisters made her do everything around the house, including cleaning the ashes and cinders from the fireplace. She always got cinders all over her dress, her hands, her feet, and even her face, just like confetti at a birthday party. Except she never got invited to birthday parties. And it wasn’t bright and colorful; it was dingy and dirty and messy. And nobody picked it up and threw it at her like confetti. They were mean enough to, but they didn’t want to get their own hands dirty. Sometimes one of the stepsisters picked up the whole cinder bucket and dumped it on her, though, which meant not only that poor Ella was even filthier than before, but also that she had to redo all her fireplace cleaning. Then both stepsisters and the stepmother chuckled and chortled and cackled and gackled and hooted and hollered with laughter until their faces turned as red as sunburnt lobsters in the Red Sea (if it were actually red). and tears ran down their faces. And down her face, too, of course. But then sometimes one stepsister laughed so hard, she fell over and rolled on the floor, getting cinders all over herself. Then Cinderella, in spite of having such a kind heart, couldn’t help laughing, which, of course, made her stepsister furious.

Or which elements of each? And what can be improved? I've been progressively sharing the first few chapters of this story as a preview, and I'm about to start the same here for feedback and as an encouragement for others to do the same, but here are two versions of the cover art. This edgy but clean comedic adaptation of "Cinderella" is meant as a Christian allegory about discernment. One idea with retellings like this one is to have: *A non-religious version that can be used in public schools and can become an unexpressed magnet to draw a following for the sake of explicitly Christian output. *Either a specifically Christian version for use in Sunday school, Christian school, and Christian homes, or... *A supplemental lesson course, designed for use in those places, that explains the Christian application. (By the way, this adaptation is not recommended for kids under age 10 because of the Fairy Oddfather's magical machine gun, which shoots magic instead of bullets, but which gives Cinderella quite a scare at first. She's afraid she's about to be shot to death, but the Fairy Oddfather is just going to use it to transform her ragged dress into a ball gown.)