Reclaiming Brotherhood, Family and Purpose
I believe men have lost their way. Not just as individuals, but as a collective. For thousands of years, we knew what it meant to be a man. We learned it through trials, through initiation, through the guidance of those who came before us. But today? That knowledge is gone. The rites of passage that turned boys into men have disappeared. The communities that raised strong, capable, purpose-driven men have crumbled. And in their place, we’ve been left with a society that keeps us weak, isolated, and distracted from what actually matters. This is something I’ve reflected on deeply. It’s not just about what I’ve read in books or studied from history. It’s my own lived experience. I grew up trying to figure out what it meant to be a man, but no one handed me the roadmap. No one gave me the initiation. Like most men today, I had to stumble through it on my own. And I refuse to let that happen to the next generation. For most of history, young men didn’t enter adulthood without being tested. Indigenous cultures all over the world had rites of passage designed to strip a boy of his childish ways and force him to step into responsibility. Aboriginal tribes had walkabouts, sending young men into the wilderness alone to survive. The Spartans had the agoge, where boys were pushed to their limits physically, mentally and emotionally. The Māori had warrior traditions that embedded discipline, respect and purpose into the hearts of their young men. These weren’t just random challenges. They were designed to show a man who he truly was and prepare him for a life of leadership and service. But we don’t do this anymore. Boys don’t become men. They just grow older. We often talk about masculinity as if it’s been the same forever, but the truth is, the modern world has completely reshaped what it means to be a man. For most of history, men weren’t absent from the home. They worked with their hands, passed down knowledge to their sons, and played an active role in raising their children. But when the Industrial Revolution came along, men were pulled out of their homes and into factories. Suddenly, the father figure wasn’t a mentor, teacher, or protector anymore—he was just a provider who was gone most of the time.