What’s your first reaction when you see a super expensive car go by? Or you see videos on YouTube: “I Just Bought A $5M Mansion (Full House Tour)” You roll your eyes on that title. And you think that the owner is probably an evil, rich douchebag or even a drug-dealer to be able to afford that. If that’s the case…congratulations you have a bad relationship with money. See, money gets into the pockets of those people who have a good relationship with it. Now it may seem bizarre to think that you have a relationship with money in the first place. But just like you have a connection, a bond, and understanding with other people, the same goes with money as well. Now most of you are walking around thinking that large sums of money only belong to the evil and corrupt people. That good-hearted, kind people like you don’t even deserve to have it. And this is the exact reason why you’re unintentionally repelling it away from you. This is the reason why you’re endlessly chasing a certain figure but can’t seem to attain it. And that is the reason why, even if you have a few good months…. Your bank balance always seem to end up showing more or less same amount you had before. Every. Single. Time. It’s like your bank account only knows that certain number and can’t seem to exceed it. But it’s not about your work ethic or your bank account holding you back. It’s your relationship with money. Think about it…what is the famous saying you heard about money while you were growing up? “Money is the root of all evil.” “Rich people are evil” “Only corrupt people get to earn lots of money” All of these statements have placed a seed in our brains by society. A seed that has now prospered into a strong, rigid tree. And it’s got to the point where we have now started to hate the rich. And with this type of conditioning…are we hating the rich or simply hating the money? The answer is unfortunately…the latter. We indirectly start to resent money by associating negative emotions to it.

Stop Smiling. Stop being a yes man. And stop being nice. Let me explain. ⛔ You only smile just to appear nice and not because you feel like it. “Oh but I’m a gigly person who likes to smile often…” That’s a lie you tell yourself. I say that’s a lie because think about it… When was the last time you smiled when you’re using your phone behind closed doors? Less. You smile less when you’re alone. (apart from a few exceptions) You watch several memes, and you smile and laugh at ONLY a few specific ones. Heck, you might even laugh uncontrollably at a few memes. But they’re just a FEW. Compare that with when you’re out in public…Somebody says something… And you’re smiling ear to ear like a giggly little toddler. ☺️ Not because something genuinely appeals to your interest. But just to be nice to the other person. And it boils my blood to see that. 😡 Don’t get me wrong…I’m not opposed to being nice. I love it when people smile genuinely. But I’m opposed to FAKING yourself to the point where you’re doing things for others. You’re literally a slave to others. Smiling, nodding, and being a yes-man just so you can ‘preserve’ that relationship. Just so you can come across as more friendly. But when was the last time you really felt comfortable around a friend who smiled all the time without disagreeing with you? If you experienced a person like that…chances are… they're not your closest friends (and can never be one because of this very trait…let me explain). You see, no matter how much we feel like we’re doing something good by being nice But the truth is…being nice is actually pretty counter-intuitive. Think of your best friend. Your best mate, with whom you can shoot the shit for hours without feeling bored. That best friend who, whenever you approach, you immediately connect without ever going over the boring small talk. Think of that friend and tell me…are they nice to you? When you think of that person….does anything ‘nice’ come to mind? The answer is probably NO.

Most of my social interactions became better once I stopped obsessing over having the perfect body language. The internet is filled with advice that is supposed to “help you.” But it did the opposite for me. Heck, it made me even worse when it comes to social interactions. “Sit up straight!” “Don’t cross your arms!” “Smile or it’s rude otherwise!” “Nod often, but not too often that you seem like a bobble head.” “Use gestures, but don’t show your palms too often, that’s a sign of weakness!” “Make sure you’re making strong eye contact, but not more than 5 sec, that’s creepy!” All of this advice became counterintuitive because I used to spend most of my time overthinking my moves instead of the conversations themselves. It was no different than being sandwiched by two walls that are moving towards your body to crush you. Because one side of your mind is trying to help you with the information. While the other is trying to correct you so “you don’t give off the wrong signals.” “My smile isn’t proper yet…I should smile more or it’ll come across as dismissive!” “Oh should I place my hands this way…NO that’s a weak body language position.” “Shit, I’m tired of sitting up straight, I wanna lean back. NO WAIT, I CAN’T, that’ll give people the wrong signal.” And this is where I found myself becoming socially worse. I found myself constantly battling inside my mind, trying to balance these two voices. And to other people…I was this shy, awkward guy who didn’t have much say in a conversation. No wonder that happened because all the conversations were happening inside my head. And I zoned out half of the time, and couldn’t pace myself with the flow of the conversation. In groups, everybody reacted & responded, but I found myself to be too ‘slow’ to even catch up. “What was that?” I often asked after missing an obviously clear & loud joke. This made me even more self-conscious, and that little voice became a huge monster. A monster that started to haunt me by hurling bitter things at me whenever I was behind in a conversation.

It’s hard to describe the kind of freedom you feel where every person feels approachable. When you can talk to anyone without your chest tightening. That feeling alone changed how I experience the entire world. But I wasn’t always like this. For the longest time, I had severe social anxiety. My father urged me to go and talk to the cashiers & shop clerks… But that was equivalent to swallowing poison to me. Whenever I was greeted with the thought of speaking to a stranger. I got that suffocating feeling in my chest. Even in a spacious room, I felt constricted. I felt physically sick, and my body even warmed up. Even with a room full of people, I couldn’t enjoy myself. My thoughts consumed me, and my fight-or-flight mode activated each time I found myself in such scenarios. “Gosh, I wanna get back home.” And each time I was out with people, I wanted to rush back home. Thinking that I’d crush it the next time, since it’ll be a fresh start. But that was a lie. Because the cycle only repeated. And it repeated for years… The worst part about it was that I saw every interaction as a “performance.” “Oh, I didn’t perform good yesterday.” I said to myself often after meeting people. Since I thought of it in a performance frame, I felt so much pressure to perform well. And I had “performance anxiety” the entire time. Watching YouTube videos on improving my social interactions made the situation even worse. I often found my thoughts going against me, depending on the videos I’d watched. “Sit up straight!” “Your body language isn’t correct!” “You’re smiling too much, that’ll come across as weak!” “You’re losing eye contact, it should be 3-4 sec long!” “You’re nodding too much!” It was a disaster… It almost felt like it would continue for the rest of my life. And I couldn’t even think what that life would be like if I continued living underneath this burden. Apart from that, there was this regret that I had each night going to sleep after a “failed” interaction.

I was a phone junkie…if you were to look at my screen time a few years ago, you’d see 10hr per day easily. Insta, YouTube, and Facebook were the highlights of my day for years… People do dr*gs and are called junkies, but I was nothing short of a phone junkie…. Being hooked on this 6-inch device for life meant wasting away my life.. That’s why I decided to change. And after going on and off for a few months, I’m fully phone sober ;) Now, my screen is around 1-2min per day on average. I've completely cut out phone usage and shifted to working on my PC instead. (It has been so well for my brain and my productivity) I've also cut out Social media usage, made a separate account on Instagram for business use. Cutting out social media has also been a game-changer (I used to be anxious, frustrated, and had massive brain rot) ☢️ I've also eliminated short-form content (reels, yt shorts, etc) almost entirely. I've found that unintentional content consumption leads me to feel like I have no control over myself. Which in turn made me feel like shit (and I didn't wanna get anything done then) And I used to have this constant heavy feeling in my head in the middle of the day whenever I scrolled through short-form content. Even when I use my Insta (business account), I've made a rule to never touch the For You page or the Reels. I've noticed the For You page usually contains images that lead you to reels… Or this page simply contains downright lustful content (which you then click on, and the algorithm blasts you with more of this filthy content). Even on PC, I have a YT shorts blocker extension, which has been a game-changer. I do record videos on my phone, and that takes the majority of the time, but that’s about it. If someone's facing these issues, let me know in the comments. I'd love to remove this painful trap from your life.