@Lee Patterson reading the PDF book starting to recognise what this all means . It seems we are connected through nervous systems . It makes sense and without blame i realise why humans can become disregulated . I see if a mother has trauma that trauma get wired down to her baby which is why i see it as generational . Heal the nervous system heal connection . After I first met you both over zoom I went on a 5 year study of attachment theory you know secure , insecure , anxious , avoidant etc etc . My baseline attachement was fearful- Avoidant I never learned how to regulate it hence runner / chaser cycles . I realised i dont want to run anymore at least not from myself . No more running but in not running my disregulated system is trying to adjust to standing still and thats the hurdle . I am not saying it cannot be fixed or healed I am saying it is something i am ready to feel . It is painful but the only other option is staying on the hamster wheel and i am tired of that ❤️❤️

@Lee Patterson ready to throw that rusty hamster wheel in the wheely bin 😊

I may need you later down the road . EMDR has a two year waiting list in the UK . I am still up for root camp once that finalised payment comes through ❤️❤️

@Lee Patterson I spoke to my brother in quite some months tonight something has budged a huge fight caused by him giving up and accepting to meet me . Looks like i am the first in the bloodline to crack open the cage . Massive egos in my family .