I applied for something a role I really wanted and I didn’t get it, and do you know what, when I got the feedback back, they were right, and that’s the bit that hit me the most because I couldn’t even argue it, I could see exactly what I’d done. So she said she loved my energy on a recent group call I joined, loved how I came across, felt really drawn to me… and then she read my responses and it just didn’t match that at all, she said it felt like AI, really formal and not aligned with how I showed up. And I was just sat there like… for fuck’s sake, because I knew, I knew exactly what had happened. I went straight back into what I can only describe as my Social Worker brain, like structured, professional, report-writing mode, and I didn’t even think about it, I just defaulted, questions… answers underneath… Google doc… the whole thing like I used to do for court reports. And this is where my brain does what it does… because I’m dyslexic, because of how I was trained, because of masking if I’m really honest… I have this “safe” way of communicating that sounds right, sounds professional, ticks the boxes…Plus with my Autism I mirror things that I see, things like dashes and dots. …but it’s not actually me. And I’ve done SO much work on using my voice, like really using it, showing up as me, saying things how I actually say them, not overthinking every word… and then on one thing, one simple task, I just slipped straight back into that version of me that knows how to be accepted… but doesn’t actually reflect who I am now. That’s the bit that peed me off. Not that I didn’t get it… but that I abandoned myself in that moment without even realising. And I think this is where neurodiversity comes into it in a way people don’t always talk about… that default settingthat maskingthat “this is how I SHOULD say it” voice it’s fast… it’s automatic… and it often kicks in when something matters. So I messaged her back and I just owned it, explained it properly, didn’t try and dress it up, just said yeah… that’s exactly what I did.

THE EXPERIMENT THAT MESSED WITH MY RHYTHM So last week I did an experiment with my coach in regards to posting content, which on the surface sounds really simple, but actually it wasn’t. The experiment was to not post content and instead focus on having more human connections with people. Now the human connection part was great, I really enjoyed that side of it, but the not posting content part felt a lot harder than I expected it to. If I’m honest, it feels like it knocked me out of my flow a little bit. Before that, I was in a rhythm with my videos and the content I was putting out, I knew what I was doing, I felt aligned with it, and then suddenly that consistency shifted. Since then, everything has felt a bit more bitty, like I’m not quite grounded in the same way I was before. JUGGLING LIFE, BUSINESS AND A BIG MOVE At the same time, there’s a lot going on at home. I’m not just thinking about content and business, I’m also sorting through the house, selling things, and getting everything ready for the move to Bali. But it’s not just physical belongings, it’s also the legal side of things that need to be sorted before I leave, things with the house itself, homeschooling Lily, continuing to work, supporting my two adult daughters with their children, and still making time to actually be present with my adult kids and my grandchildren. When I really sit and look at it, there’s a lot happening all at once. And over the last couple of days I’ve really started to feel the weight of that. It’s not even just the doing, it’s the mental load of holding it all at the same time. OLD PATTERNS CREEPING BACK IN What I’ve noticed is that I’ve slipped slightly back into old patterns. That habit of putting everything else before the things that are actually going to move me forward has started to creep back in. It’s subtle, but I can see it, and once you see it, you can’t unsee it. That awareness is frustrating, but it’s also important, because it gives me the opportunity to do something different rather than just falling fully back into it.

Ever Feel Like Everyone Else Got the “How to Be Normal” Rule Book… and You Didn’t? Like you’re watching, copying, adjusting… Trying to get it right. Trying to fit in. Trying not to stand out. In neurodiversity, there’s a word for that. It’s called masking.

Do you say “Don’t be rude. Give them a kiss.” Or do you listen? This might seem like a small thing. But for neurodivergent children especially, personal space and physical boundaries matter a lot. Their nervous systems often experience the world more intensely. Touch. Noise. Expectations. Proximity. Everything can feel amplified. Yet as adults we sometimes override those signals without even thinking about it. We tell children to ignore their instincts. We tell them to comply. And then we wonder why so many adults struggle with boundaries later in life. I shared a video today talking about why personal space and consent matter so much for neurodivergent kids. Would love to hear your thoughts on this. And if you're a mum navigating neurodiversity, I’ve created a space called Mums Embracing Neurodiversity where we talk about these things openly.

One thing people often say about me as a parent is that I’m very open with my kids. Honestly… they’re right. People have been shocked before when they hear the conversations we have in our house. But the reason is simple. I would always rather my children ask me the question than go looking for the answer somewhere else. Especially online. When I was a Social Worker, I worked with many teens, naturally the topic of sex came up often. I remember one boy in particular, the topic of sex was rife for him and his friends. The boys were talking about things they’d heard, things they’d seen online, and a lot of it wasn’t exactly accurate. At one point a few of the of the mums said to me, “Can you talk to our sons? Because we don’t even know how to start that conversation.” So one afternoon we did. I bought a load of condoms, grabbed some bananas, and we sat there talking about bodies, relationships and what actually happens as you grow up. The boys made jokes, of course they did. They were teenagers. But we laughed, we talked, and by the end of it something shifted. The conversations became normal. This lad even told me later that when things came up at school he already understood what was happening, because we had already talked about it. This was the same for my own children. You see for me, this has never been about awkward conversations. It’s about safe conversations. Because if children don’t feel they can ask their parents, or other safe adults around them the questions, they will still go looking for answers. They just won’t always find them in the right places. And when you’re raising neurodiverse children, those conversations become even more important. Literal thinking, curiosity, and the internet can be a very complicated mix. That’s one of the reasons I created Mums Embracing Neurodiversity. Because parents need somewhere they can talk honestly about these things. Without judgement.Without shame. And without feeling like they have to pretend they’ve got it all figured out.