My new homegirl Miley released the video for "Walk of Fame" today. I've been loving this song for the last few weeks. It speaks to me on so many levels. I was recently wrestling with my fear of fame I had my whole life (although I didn't realize it was fear). When I was a child I wanted to be a singer/rock star. I've always loved singing and was in choirs and chorus in school. But I had stage fright and couldn't do solos. In the 8th grade (around 1990) I was invited to try out for the school FAME (Laguardia Performing Arts). My mother tortured me the night before my audition and I bawled my eyes out all night and wasn't even going to go try out. She told me I wasn't good enough and she didn't want me to be disappointed, yet she wouldn't let me go to my best friends' birthday party the night before because you know I had to wake up early and go to the audition. Looking back now I realized that this is the classic MO of a narcissist, to break you down right before you have something important to do or to go. My dad woke me up the next morning to take me, but I didn't want to go. My voice was hoarse from crying all night and my eyes and face were all puffy. He told me that I deserved this opportunity because I was so talented. He, gently, convinced me to go. He drove me all the way to Manhattan and made sure he took me into the school. There were 100's of kids from all around the country there to audition. I was there for songwriting and singing. It was a very nerve-wrecking day. When it was finally my time to audition for singing I was up on stage (it was one of the many large classrooms that was set up like a small auditorium) and listening to the teachers and judges give me direction. Just as I was about to sing, some kids in the hallway were goofing around and threw a chair up against the door and I was startled (as were the teachers). They had to go out and yell at them. But my nerves were already wrecked (I may have even been crying). My voice was so shaky that they decided it was only fair if I went to audition with the other set of judges so I had a fresh start. So I did. When it was through, I went and found my dad waiting for me and I cried and cried and cried. I told him what happened and I was so upset. But you know what, I still made into the school! It didn't matter, because my mother would not let me attend the school.