Today's Fireside topic was: Observe, Don't Absorb. As we talked about what that means in real life, one of us described it simply as "staying in my lane." Sometimes the challenge isn't knowing where the boundary is, it's having the courage to honor it. When we remind ourselves to stay in our lane, we're less likely to take responsibility for things that were never ours to carry, and more able to step back and simply observe what is happening around us. Several of us acknowledged that observing without absorbing is easier said than done. We care deeply about people. We see their struggles, their mistakes, their self-sabotage, and naturally want to help. But often, that desire to help pulls us right back into patterns of overextending ourselves, trying to fix problems that aren't ours to solve. One member shared that she'd love to hear from people who seem naturally gifted at not absorbing the emotions and choices of others. What wisdom do they have? How do they remain compassionate without becoming responsible? We also discussed the reality that when we begin setting healthier boundaries, the people around us may not immediately celebrate the change. In fact, they may push back. When others are accustomed to our rescuing, fixing, or carrying, stepping out of that role can feel uncomfortable for everyone involved. That's why holding boundaries isn't about controlling others but more it's about protecting our own well-being. The biggest takeaway from the conversation is that observing doesn't mean we stop caring. It means we trust others enough to let them walk their own path, make their own choices, and learn their own lessons. We can offer support without carrying the weight. We can care without absorbing. As one of us put it, "Who knew that protecting your peace would not be peaceful." Sometimes the most loving thing we can do both for ourselves and for others, it just to "stay in our lane." Great conversation everyone, thanks to all that joined! If YOU are interested in coming to the Fireside chat, we have them at 8am PST on Tuesdays. The topics are in the calendar. Hope to see everyone there!

Today we talked about being introverted, extroverted, or an ambivert. Are we introverted, or just overstimulated? What's the difference between solitude and isolation? Meaningful connections vs social exhaustion Why some conversations energize us while others drain us How our personality changes with safety, age, burnout, or life stage. I had to really examine personally, what I enjoyed. Which interactions drain my energy, even if I really like the people I'm with. Who are the people in my life that I don't have to perform for. While there is no "wrong" way to be, it is interesting how our lives have moved or situations that have changed the way our energy moves. Widen your lens. Maybe the goal isn't to be come more social or more private, but to become more honest with yourself about what restores you. I'm certainly am ambivert - all the way. How about you?

Hi friends, I just wanted to let you all know I will miss the chat time tomorrow. I will be doing the eulogy and prayer for my friend who recently passed on with early Alzheimer’s disease. Her memorial in the morning. 💗

A big thank you to all who showed up for our first ever Fireside chat! Our discussion Tuesday was to share a piece of wisdom that someone shared with you that stayed with you. As I was preparing for the chat, I realized that advice, and wisdom, are two different things. So I brought it to the group for reflection. Advice vs Wisdom. When someone asks for advice, where do you pull the answer you provide from? Prior experience? And if so, can it be a blanket piece of advice no matter the person or situation? Or do you pull it from prior experience and share it as wisdom; well earned and simply suggested as an option for them to consider? Here are some talking points we touched on, and a couple we did not: Advice feels like pressure, and wisdom feels like permission. Advice tries to solve the moment, Wisdom helps people see life differently. Advice comes quickly, wisdom usually comes slowly. Advice assumes the same solution will work for everyone, and wisdom leaves room for different paths. Advice tells people what to do, wisdom shares what someone learned. We also discussed the question, Why? A few years ago, I was discussing my bookshelves in my office in Connies group, and as I was wrestling with what should stay and what I should let go of, I said, well if I get rid of everything I will have empty shelves, and she said, "so?!" I was struck. Not fill every space? Tough to comprehend. She continued on, when someone makes a suggestion to you- or asks you to do something and you immediately come to the negative answer... "I can't have bare shelves" or "I can't go swimming because I don't wear a swimsuit any more" or "No thanks, I don't dance." (or anything like this) just ask yourself "Why." Maybe you really do want bare shelves. Maybe you do want to swim. Maybe you'd love to dance. This was a great slice of wisdom back then that I think of even still. I love being around a campfire with you guys❤️ -See you next week! Jess

Tonight’s Campfire Question ☕🔥 What is something you’ve learned in life that you wish you had understood sooner? Sometimes those lessons arrive quietly… and only make sense years later. I’d love to hear yours.