“Not everything needs to be figured out quickly. Some things are meant to be understood slowly.”

This time it was about expectations, and how we handle them. Connie brought up that she doesn't start with an expectation. An intention can move to a goal, and then move into an expectation. She lives in intentions, which resonated with me since an intention is something I can do for myself. An expectation can really be a heavy lift at times. Mike mentioned Disneyland, and how as parents you rush from one thing to another to another because we (adults) know how to work the park. But it can potentially take the joy out of the experience for the youngsters. His son wanted to get out of line and go do something else. He obliged and that trip today is remembered as one of the best. Kathy also said that her son wanted Mickey pancakes, and it took about an hour or more to do that - and while she kept thinking "we are wasting precious time" her son was enjoying every moment of breakfast and each bite of pancakes, and yes - for him too- it still comes up when they talk about that trip. I have literally RUN my kids from ride to ride to hit the great ones first because "you'll miss it if you don't do it this way" but - what did I miss by not allowing them to orchestrate the day. My take away for this is to be more mindful of the little ones and listen to their requests while letting my expectations of what "the best way" is. And Lori mentioned that life may have taken a turn that blew any expectation you may have had out of the water. While I think the pivot she chose is amazing - I know her expectation of what life would look like right now is different then the life she has. If you reflect back to: "I thought I had to keep everyone happy!" I thought my relationships would follow a certain path!" "I thought I'd have it figured out by this age..." "I thought my success had to look a certain way." Are there expectations you may be holding onto now, without realizing it? Does disappointment come from expectation? Connie mentioned a book called "1000 names for Joy: Living in Harmony with the Way Things Are" by Byron Katie.

I appreciated seeing those of you who came to our chat. This time it was about "Knowing when something is enough..." We talked about 5 different parts of our lives, and how "enough" might show up (or not.). Personal Growth / Self Improvement; which shows up as constantly working on yourself but rarely pause to feel ok about who you are right now. Relationships; which shows up as doing your part in a situation but still trying to manage the outcome, or giving more energy then you have because you don't want to let someone down. Work / Productivity; Looks like you finishing what needs to be done but then looking for more to tackle. Home / To Do Lists; House is clean enough but you find one more thing to organize, or you Spend the weekend catching up on tasks instead of enjoying the space you have. Money / Resources; You've saved a decent amount but you still can't relax about money, or you reach a goal but then you move the goalpost. I personally can see myself in ALL of these, which is why this topic turned a bit more into Jess guidance then chat - but this is why I appreciate you all. The different perspectives that you all bring up allows me to both give myself grace but also to learn (and keep learning) that I need to pause and enjoy more. If you weren't able to join us this week, I asked the group for feedback on our Fireside chats, or anything they'd like to share as to how this group is structured, or what they'd like to see. The answer: A resounding desire for an "open discussion chat." I hear you! Let's have our First Ever WILDFIRE CHAT on April 7th. I will need a second cup of coffee for this one! Thanks all - see you next week! Jess

“Kindness is not something you do. It’s something you are.” -Raktim Ganguly

“Some of us think in straight lines. Some of us think in circles that eventually land in the right place. Neither is wrong. They just see the path differently.” When sitting with my husband this weekend I noticed that his stories are often A to B, while mine take the most curvy mountainous road with hills and dips and turns and switchbacks before eventually finding their destination. More often than not, the details make me think of other things I want to do, places to go, or ideas to try. He always listens to me (occasionally asking how I made it from one thing to the next - to which sometimes there is no logical answer) and mostly keeps up with me. After he left and I was thinking about how differently we plan, storytell, etc, I wondered why is it like that? He thinks "Why are you going all over the place" while I think "How are you skipping all these important pieces?!" All I can think of is he moves us forward, and I make it make sense. The sweet spot is we can bring it all together.