What he saw: he saw me sit in my emotions. He saw my emotions rise in my tone. He saw me explain why this was so hard for me. Not all of my actions were ideal, but they were significantly improved from how I handled things in the past.
Re: Masculinity “What does it mean to raise a good man right now - and does that definition look different than 20 years ago?” (You missed a good one…I interviewed myself. But I forgot to push record otherwise, I would’ve shared the in depth conversation 🤪)
Mine was playing golf with him. Doing something together seemed to be our thing vs. talking and connecting in a more emotional manner. I do wonder how much closer (figuratively since he's in the Philippines) we'd be - had we had more meaningful conversations. Good news is, I nudged him into opening up/being a much more present Grand and Great Grandfather now!
There was a period where he took me hunting and fishing, even though he wasn't your typical "outdoorsman". I also remember him teaching me how to drive a stick shift. It helps the memory that it was in a really cool car, a dark red 1991 Nissan 300zx.
What’s one thing your son is going through right now that you only know about, because he told someone else — and why do you think he didn’t he tell you?
That he feels like when we leave my son at night after tucking him in, that it "feels like a rope is being pulled out of him and then it snaps". He's 9, and he has an amazing way with words, when it comes to describing what he is feeling inside.