I post a lot of the good stuff here - itās always awesome to see the progress, to get out of the fog and feel alive againā¦.but some days are still harder than others. The last 2 days Iāve had really strong cravings. Not for any other reason than the massive amount of stress Iāve had dumped on me at work the last 3 weeks. Stress is real but stress management is whatās important and I do pretty well for the most part. Iām strong, Iāve got a lot of grit, and I donāt get my feelings hurts by almost anyone butā¦.I am a manager in a male dominated field. Have been for a really long time, itās not new to me. This āteam,ā however, is new to me and Iāve never known so many man-babies to exist in one room. Theyāre known in for their toxic atmosphere, for running off managersā¦I wonāt be run off, but their habitual āanonymousā reporting to HR and being investigated just gets old no matter who you are. Of course the claims have all been unfounded and I knew they would be, but itās still the idea of being in a room where you never know who is going to smile to your face and turn on you behind your back. I hope after this last go-round, these guys start to straighten up. I havenāt caved, I got an iced vanilla latte with an extra shot of espresso instead, lol, and enough club soda to keep the company in business, but the craving to just numb it is still definitely there. Even this morning. Iām going to go and get some sunshine and do something productive in my wood shop, maybe mow. I wonāt lie, I hate yard work š. It might have something to do with the fact I thought I had to be miss-I-can-do-it-by-myself and buy a country house on 5 acres. Lol. I do have horses on about half of it so that helps a smidge. Going to get through another day until the craving goes away. šŖš½ I like to pinpoint my cravings now, so I can talk myself through what I ACTUALLY need. No, I donāt need beer to numb the fact that Iām feeling stressed and pressure from some boys who donāt like following policies and procedures. No way am I going to let people who donāt truly matter to me at the end of the day cause me to mess up my personal goals - they arenāt worth the spiral.