Wow. Word to me. Hearing that is such a relief. I am journaling loads about the wrong ideas I see that I am most keen to let go. Wrong responses to the idea of learning. It's a big thing. The way I see it now is that learning all this stuff is exactly the opposite of how to learn but also learning stuff that is exactly the opposite of my habituated way of doing and going about things. Big thank you for this message.

Everyone who gets to know me a bit has always said that I am hard on my self. Something I cannot see. I suspect that this is part of my negative habit construct. So destructive. It must be about inviting the opposite way of going about things!

It's so interesting. The pause, change nothing, when ready. But then the extra few beats of breath in after a stop. This seems to link in with upward thought, and it the ah is a soft thing in the face and also makes me want to take a natural yawn which I presume is a needed thing if it wants to happen?

I love the pause. I find that my habit of largely un-necessary worry about negative possibilities ends up in a worried sense in my face. I've started to notice this. I have increased ability to just put those thoughts and ideas (that's all they are it seems) out of my mind. It is this for me that automatically allows the sense of a smile or at least the thought in the face and jaw of softening. This is so interesting. This then links in with allowing the breath to happen. So tempting for me to make it happen. But then it's been so interesting to understand special breath work in this context. It seems to have greater power. The beats seem to give me a sense of opportunity to connect with the breath and what is is. Really helpful and calming in a further way. Thank you James. Great session for me.

Yes I can really see that. Hard to spot - so embedded! I have a lot of discovering to do. At some point I may have begun to begin!! Thank you.

I appreciate the 'when you're ready', and as James says, the beats not being seconds but our own. Without the 'when I'm ready' I interfere with the moment the breath is just going to occur without me 'helping it'. For me, the 'when I'm ready' is when the breath is just going to happen without me doing it. This is an interesting space where its as if there is more residual breath to be allowed to exhale but without me helping that either. For the beats, I have started by making them to fit the actual length the in breath takes (which is interestingly very short and shallow for me at times); followed by the 5 to hold at the same rate (again really short but a bit longer by a beat); and then 6 for out at the same rate. I am then finding that the in breath is not ''ready' (perhaps not needed?!) so the 6 turns into longer!. This pause seems very calming too. Interesting exploration, I will see what happens with this and write on here what happens! James' mention of having an idea of the expanding back and neck (I think of the whole expanse of that right out up the back of my head) to the best of my ability. This gives me a greater sense of where the breath is but also something I cannot put in words but something like - 'It's okay, this is something of where I am, even who I am'. This helps me relate in a much more measured, sensible and calmer way in my relationship to things coming at me, duties to others, things to be done et cetera. Thank you James.

@Heather Clawson I like your description 'calmly choosing'. I've been beginning to realise before I read that - that I don't calmly choose but that's exactly it.