Hi everyone! As I continue to navigate integration, I find myself constantly asking “wait - is it really this easy? Can it really be this easy?” The act of surrendering isn’t easy and I’m still working on it but in those moments where I do experience complete surrender, I feel a crazy sense of peace and no pain in my body. Matter of fact, in those moments my body actually feels like a “suit for my spirit” and then I just think - waittttt a minute, trusting God, remaining present, just letting thoughts come and go, and knowing that my worth isn’t determined by anything outside of myself…….is it really that easy? It has me feeling so excited, but also a little scared just because I’m headed into unknown space after living with the mental and physical pain my whole life. Obviously I still have bills and real life issues but whereas I used to be perpetually anxious and worrisome, it actually takes work for me to worry now haha. I find myself realizing it’s taking too much energy and it’s annoying me to worry lol so I just don’t 🤷🏾‍♀️ this is a scary place to be because ego (I think it’s ego) is constantly trying to tell me it’s not real, I’m hallucinating, dreaming or whatever.

Since it's two years anniversary of the solar eclipse ( my fb memory reminded me lol ) that we experience in New Jersey I need to ask this question . Did anyone noticed the sun light different since then ? I have photography friends that also noticed that . It's brighter and more white than before . I believe it happened after eclipse or around pandemic ? Definitely not long ago . What do you think ?

I had a Thai massage today where they walk on your back and do lots of stretching and I started crying!!!!! So much was released and I was realizing how my body was really in a perpetual state of clenching/bracing. But I thanked that version for keeping me safe and helping me survive and I was able to let it go and feel relief. I also noticed how everything is connected. Sometimes she would do something with my foot that I felt in my neck. Which was my experience with Bufo. That there is no end or beginning. It’s all connected and it’s all God. For the first time I’m happy to be in my body ❤️

Just a friendly check in 🫶

Hi everyone 👋 So happy to be part of this group 😍 I think its perfect place for me to ask this question and not being called crazy 😬😅 Twice in my lifetimes so far I was able to control my dreams , meaning I knew I was dreaming . If I was dreaming "scary" things I was able to wake up . I knew it was a dream . I would wake up first in my own bed but it was still a dream and then I would wake up for real . I was able to bring my grandma and grandpa once 🥹 and best part ... I made myself fly 🤩 that was pretty cool . Did anyone else experience this ? Have a lovely day beautiful souls ✨