I swear when I think about everything that happened throughout my addiction I do have regrets. One of them is by allowing my addiction to have a impact on me as a mother to my children. They seen a lot that they never should have. So I have 5 children. I have three adult daughters. I had a son that turned 13 this year that I gave up for adoption at 5 days old in my addiction and I have a three year old son that I had after I got clean. I don't have a relationship with my oldest son but I do with my grown up daughters and I'm so so grateful for that love and acceptance they have decided to have with me in my sobriety. I signed over my rights to my daughter's when I gave my oldest son up for adoption to give them a chance at have a normal life instead of further seeing and being involved in the dysfunction. I have custody of my 3 year old son and he has a totally different version of a mother then the others once had. I feel like for my oldest daughter (she's 26) she's having issues accepting that and is kind of resentful towards my youngest son.

Is it just me or is music therapeutic to the soul? There is a song for every mood every feeling that you can relate to.

Good morning everyone. God allowed me to take a breath and open my eyes when I woke up. I am truly blessed and grateful. Plus my coffee I made tastes amazing 🤩

Does Relapse mean Reset ?

So for the last year or so I have not been actively in therapy or medicated. I have severe cptsd and bipolar symptoms. I don't like taking medications bc I'm straight edge and I don't like how they make me feel but I'm struggling bc I'm having some issues controlling my emotions and everything is super heightened from my cptsd. I'm proud of myself. I made a appointment for Friday and am going to strongly take meds into consideration.