Hi, I'm Candy and I am taking care of my 81 year old mother who is in stage 4 Alzheimer"s. I have a rather compound problem because my mom is, and has always been a narcissist, and now also has dementia. i am finding it very difficult to deal with and really hope someone here will have some helpful insight.

Mom wants to be "the boss" and in control of everyone and everything around her, She feels that all of her intrusive questions about the private life of myself and her adult grandchildren should not only be answered but answered in great detail. She also gives a lot of unsolicited "advice" about what she thinks everyone should and shouldn't do, When her questions are not answered to her satisfaction and her "advice" (which is mostly condemnation and telling everyone how they fall below her and her standards) is not appreciated or acted upon she has explosive rage during which she is extremely verbally abusive. Needless to say, this causes me to relive much of my childhood trauma.