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Owned by Robin

Practical dementia guidance. Compassionate caregiver support.

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6 contributions to Dementia Caregiver Collective
When Small Holidays Look Different as a Caregiver
🍀🍀🍀Happy St. Patrick's Day!🍀🍀🍀 Small holidays have a way of reminding us how life has changed. Days like St. Patrick’s Day used to be simple. Maybe you wore something green, shared a meal with friends, or enjoyed a lighthearted moment together. It might not have been a major celebration, but it still felt like a small pause in the rhythm of life. When you are caring for someone living with dementia, even the small holidays can feel different. Sometimes the day passes quietly because caregiving responsibilities take center stage. The routine of medications, meals, appointments, or simply keeping your loved one comfortable may leave little room for celebration. Other times, you may try to bring a small touch of the holiday into the day. Perhaps it is playing a familiar Irish song, sharing a favorite meal, or simply acknowledging the date on the calendar. Caregiving often reshapes how we mark time. What once felt like celebration may now feel like connection in smaller ways. A quiet moment of laughter. A shared memory. Sitting together with a cup of tea. These moments may not look like the holidays you remember, but they still carry meaning. In many ways, caregiving teaches us that the value of a day is not always in how much we celebrate it, but in how we show up for one another within it. If today looks different than it once did, that is part of the caregiving journey many of us share. And sometimes, those quiet moments of presence become the most meaningful part of the day. Reflection for our community How do small holidays look in your home now compared to a few years ago? Sometimes sharing our experiences reminds others that they are not alone in this journey. The information provided by Dementia Caregivers Collective is educational and supportive in nature and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult a qualified healthcare professional regarding medical decisions.
1 like • 13d
@Dee dee Lee what a beautiful memory, thank you for sharing. You are exceptional at creating the environment for healing, calm and peace. You're an angel with skin.
0 likes • 13d
@Vickie Helm Thank you for sharing because that is really the heart of it, the hugs, the love, having everyone there.
The 90 Day Stability Plan: What To Focus On When Everything Feels Like It’s Falling Apart
Last Tuesday, a woman in our community told me something I have heard hundreds of times before. “I wake up already behind.” Before her feet hit the floor, she is thinking about medications, breakfast resistance, the appointment she has to reschedule, the email she forgot to answer, and the quiet fear in the back of her mind that something else will decline today. Nothing dramatic happened. No emergency. No hospitalization. Just the steady, grinding weight of responsibility. If you are caring for someone living with dementia, you are all too familiar with this feeling. It is not chaos in one explosive moment. It is the slow erosion of certainty. And here is the truth no one tells you: Most caregivers are not failing. They are operating without a stabilization plan. When everything feels like it is falling apart, what you actually need is not more information. You need focus. This is where the 90 Day Stability Plan begins. Why 90 Days? Because dementia progression feels unpredictable. But your response does not have to be. Ninety days gives you enough time to: - Stabilize safety risks - Initiate and simplify routines - Organize documentation - Reduce reactive decision making - Regain a sense of control You cannot fix dementia. But you can stabilize your environment. And stability changes everything. The Three Pillars of Stability For the next 90 days, you focus on only three pillars. Not twenty. Not everything. Three!!! Pillar 1: Safety First, Always When overwhelm rises, safety must become your filter for every decision. Ask yourself: - Is the environment in the home physically safe? - Are medications organized clearly and accurately and out of reach? - Is a possible wandering risk addressed? - Are emergency numbers accessible?
1 like • 26d
@Vickie Helm thank you for joining in the conversation
Compassionate Dementia Aggression Management Tool
For the Founding Members of this Community we' like to share a quick, handy guide to de-escalating the common aggressive behaviors you may have experienced. You can access in the Classroom tab, or click this link--> https://www.skool.com/dementiacaregivercollective/classroom We’re sharing this openly for now as we build, later it will live inside our paid resources. Thank you for being here early.
0 likes • Feb 21
@Vickie Helm Thank you for checking it out.
1 like • Feb 22
@Karen Saxe Eppley thank you! Your input is greatly appreciated, I value your expertise.
Hi, I'm Edie and so glad to be here.
Hi, thanks for the invitation. I am so looking forward to this skool.
2 likes • Feb 18
Thank you for being one of the first to join us Deedee, so glad you are here. Is there something in particular that you are interesting in learning or sharing?
1 like • Feb 19
@Dee dee Lee Thank you! That is a very good question, and there are lots of layers to the answer. First you might consider what's behind that "Stubborness" it may actually be fear (of pain, anesthesia, hospitals), confusion about what’s happening, loss of control, most often it also has a bit of past trauma or mistrust. Then consider your friend's ability to make a complex decision about the surgery. Informed consent implies that the person is able to make that. Consider this as a strategy. First, think short, concrete explanations. We may be tempted to fill in the gaps with all the information, but that can add to confusion. You can also help be providing reassurance about who will be there, stay focused on their comfort and safety. This one may feel a little harder, but give them some limited choices like- “Would you like the morning ride or the afternoon one? if possible. There are legal ramifications if the person is considered competent. If not, then they health care proxy needs to step in and deal with the issues. Can you get the doc on the phone for a quick telehealth to talk them through things? Let me know how it works out. Or if you find a better strategy that works for your friend.
Yaaaaay I'm so happy to have found you
thank you for creating this group I am looking forward to being here
1 like • Feb 18
Yaay! I'm so happy that you did! You bring a wealth of knowledge and wisdom to the table
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Robin Helm
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@robin-helm-2617
Occupational Therapist & dementia care specialist helping caregivers find hope, community & practical tools to thrive on the caregiving journey.

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Joined Feb 17, 2026
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