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The Pleasure Project
357 members • Free
11 contributions to The Pleasure Project
Apr 14 •
There is No Erotic Without Attention
You can’t pay attention busy. You can’t pay attention when your mind is scanning for what’s next. Paying attention is about opening a door to presence. In sex, presence identifies safety. When attention is steady and undivided, the nervous system shifts towards a response allows the erotic to thrive. Presence and performance are opposites. Performance looks outward, managing an image. Presence turns inward, listening, receiving, allowing sensation to move without commentary. To explore the erotic, you must clear your calendar. must create spaciousness to be with your body. What is on your calendar that doesn’t need to be, yet is in the way of your paying attention, and therefore in the way of paying attention.
0 likes • Apr 21
I just got a delicious 3 days of solitude during my fasting and one of the things that I was contemplating was how do I build more time in for restorative pleasure rather than settling for compensatory pleasure. I was also reading Pleasure Activism so I got some really great ideas. :)
Apr 21 •
How do you find pleasure
“"Let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pull of what you really love.” -Rumi If you don’t know what you love, how ever will you find pleasure? How much time do you spend doing what you love? What of love have you left behind to survive? To belong? To exist? Pleasure is a fire that needs fuel. What feeds yours??
2 likes • Apr 21
I second James on physical movement...dancing, yoga, simple stretching, hiking. Sitting in the woods and watching what's happening on the ground. Standing on any kind of shoreline but especially the ocean. A great massage and oral sex (giving and receiving). Long slow kisses...Cooking delicious food for myself and others and watching them enjoy it. The list goes on...
Mar 12 •
A body that can feel can tell the truth
And a body that can tell the truth can stop performing. So many of us were trained to survive by going numb: to intellectualize, to overfunction, to be “strong,” to be palatable, to be good. Numbness is a strategy. What if you didn’t need that strategy ALL the time. Where in your body do you notice yourself going numb—or holding your breath—in daily life? When you reclaim the capacity to feel, you reclaim the capacity to choose. Experiencing ourselves at choice is a big chunk of the work here in the Pleasure Project. Erotic pleasure is purposeful, potent medicine. It sits at the crossroads of power, shame, belonging, and desire. It shows us where we clamp down, where we rush, where we barter our yes for approval. It also shows us that the body doesn’t just remember trauma, it remembers agency. It remembers what it feels like to be met, to be wanted without being used, to be in contact without being consumed. “Feeling” is the body’s way of speaking truth in a language older than logic. Boundaries. Consent. Timing. Truth. The Pleasure Project teaches new possibilities: - Safety without collapse - Aliveness without danger - Intimacy without self abandonment I am curious: what messages about pleasure have shaped your body’s capacity to receive? What might “receiving without apology” look like in your current season of life?
2 likes • Mar 31
What I have noticed in my body more and more is that I am often braced for impact. My pelvic floor muscles are almost always in a state of constant tension. As I consider this knowing in the context of the questions I can't help but feel as though my beliefs about pleasure are linked to impact of some sort and likely violation/violence. Although I practice releasing those muscles every time I notice it,, receiving without apology feels like being able to move through life without that bracing.
Feb 24 •
Cleaning Up Our Act
We say we love ourselves… but do we show up like we do? If a lover says, “I really love you,” but never makes time for you, doesn’t listen, doesn’t honor your needs, what kind of relationship is that? Fractured. Inconsistent. Painful. And yet — this is how many of us treat our bodies. We say the words, but keep overworking, numbing, pushing, performing wellness instead of living it. Cleaning up our act is about bringing integrity back to that relationship. Daily devotion in this erospiritual world simply means all the small ways we come into right relationship with our soma. Start simple: ✴ Listen to what your body is actually asking for. ✴ Offer attention, rest, and presence instead of fixing. ✴ Ask: What am I willing to stop doing that harms me? Pleasure begins here, in the honesty of how we treat ourselves. The body has been waiting for us to remember.
6 likes • Feb 24
These steps are so very simple. Practice is making them easier. Claiming what my body is actually asking for often requires some negotiation with my mind about productivity or the lack there of. Often that productivity is about "fixing" something I want to change about myself and that if I do enough healthy, intentional actions steps that I'll be better at XYZ. My Virgo Moon and Mars love a good action plan. The last handful of years and especially the 12 months has been an exercise in surrender to DO less in order to listen deeper and BE more. It has required cleaving and slowing down in ways that have been deeply uncomfortable and getting real cozy with imperfection and divine timing. The quality of my surrender has begun to shift though. At first it felt forced most of the time. It feels like more of an allowing these days. I am becoming more soft and malleable. I am learning to let go of my obsession with controlling my temporal reality. I am feeling the in the natural abundance of nature and that as a part of nature I have access to that abundance without the need to plan how it comes. Recently life has been calling me back out and I feel so awkward and vulnerable... and curious. What feels most important to me now as I re-emerge from this internal journey is living into my erotic vitality. That declaration requires integrating all this medicine into my current external conditions. It will be interesting to see what this new cycle looks like.
Jan 21 •
“Unspoken expectations are premeditated resentments.”
As I finish up this run I’m reminded to strengthen my relationship with my voice and my emotions. My voice is my friend. She protects me. She gets needs met. She is playful. My emotions are my teachers. I don’t hide them. I don’t hide from them. I don’t ignore them. How is your heart today? How is your relationship with your voice? Your emotions?
1 like • Jan 22
@Ron Daniels THIS... "I decided that since these two data points are going to be with me longer than those I am suppressing and swallowing them for… I need to get to know them"
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