I've been trying to heal from ongoing childhood trauma and grow in self love. However, I feel that because of my environment and circumstances I can never truly heal or grow. 😟 (I’ve been suffering from chronic stress, anxiety, and depression for about 9 years now.) A character/story that would best represent me and my situation right now is Rapunzel, except the controlling figure in my story is my father. Also my mom is super stressed that I'm aging (I'm in my mid twenties) and want's me to start the next chapter of my life soon. She tells me that everything will get better once I leave home (which in my case, the only option is marriage). I've gotten a proposal through a family friend. He is decent looking and his bio data also seems ok. (I haven't seen him in person or spoken to him yet.) The good part is that he just lives about 45 mins away from me. I know that I should heal first before getting married but that doesn't seem plausible in my case as I've been trying for many years to no avail. I don't want to stay stuck in my situation any longer as it's taken a huge toll on my physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health. (I feel like I'm at my limit now...). On the other hand, the thought of marriage scares me (of the unknown). And that's not the only issue, I'm an introvert who is also a niqabi, so speaking to new people in person especially of the opposite gender gives me extreme social anxiety! 😖 I don't know what to do...I'm stuck between both sides!😣 Please give me some advice! Jazakillah khair for your time! I request lots of Du'as! 🤲

@Habibatul Aulia I totally understand what you're trying to say. I also don't want marriage to be my exit as I already have a scenario of my older brother in front of me. I'm also scared of the possibility of not being able to vet the marriage prospect properly (i.e. ask the correct questions .etc). (I don't have any kind of support from my father.) From what I know, my father hasn't been actively looking for a match for me since I reached marriageable age. All the proposals that came for me were from family friends, including the current one. He doesnt seem to like this proposal as well and I think its because I rejected the one he unofficially brought. I'm stuck and confused on what I should do. It would be good to give a reply soon right? How about sending my biodata first since I received his?

Wa Alaykumus Salam dear Ahlam, Nice to meet you! 💐

@Kaleemah Johnson Neither did I until I got older and was educated in Deen. (Alhamdulillah.)

I joined this community just a bit late so I didn't get a chance to attend. 😢 InshaAllah will join the next one!

All of the above 😰