11d • poetry
A poem I wrote about my panic attacks
My chest is caving in again, I swear I feel it crack,
Heartbeat’s racing like a car crash I can’t take back.
Every breath’s a warning sign, red lights in my brain,
I tell myself I’m fine but it’s just another chain.
Mirror says “you’re worthless”, and I almost believe,
Tried to patch my heart with tape, it just won’t ever leave.
I can’t breathe in my own skin,
Feels like I’m drowning deep within.
I fake a smile, say “I’m okay,”
But I’m breaking more each day.
I’m a failure in disguise,
Screaming out behind my eyes,
No one hears the war within,
Can’t breathe in my own skin.
My head’s a hurricane, spinning guilt and fear,
All the voices in my skull are the only ones I hear.
I used to have a spark, now it’s ashes in my throat,
Every dream I ever had, I built it just to watch it float.
My friends say “it’ll pass,” but they don’t understand,
This storm inside my chest don’t listen to commands.
It’s the panic at 3 a.m.,
When your body’s not your friend,
And your heartbeat sounds like gunfire
You can’t defend.
And depression’s just a ghost
That wears my face,
It whispers, “you’re a waste,”
And I can’t escape.
Tear me open, see I bleed static,
My head’s a riot, it’s automatic.
Try to fight but my lungs give in,
Drowning in the dark again.
I can’t breathe in my own skin,
Feels like I’m fading from within.
I fake a laugh, I play the part,
But I’m collapsing in the dark.
I’m a failure in disguise,
Still I’m trying to survive,
No one hears the war within,
But I’ll learn to breathe again.
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A poem I wrote about my panic attacks
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