Breaking Generational Curses and Patterns as Musical Beings! · V1B1N Tribe 🌸🧜‍♀️🍉🦋🔆🕺💕

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Breaking Generational Curses and Patterns as Musical Beings!

and I were having a brilliant conversation in

’s Peak Parenting Group about becoming aware of the patterns (behaviour and words) from our parents, teachers and significant others that have impacted us in ways that we are not even aware of alot of the time!

The consequence can often be that we, without realising it, can parrot to ourselves, our children and others, things that we didn’t need to hear or experience! Things that have impacted the way we see ourselves and others and ultimately, hold us back from being who we want to truly be!

For me, as a musical child, it wasn’t criticism about my ability as such. It was often underhanded behaviour, from my teachers, to make me feel the need to compete with other students, even if they thought it was for my own good so that I would take music more seriously!!! Or my Mum getting regularly upset with me for not being as committed to my music as she wanted me to be! (Because she was possibly living out her own musical dreams and criticisms from her childhood, which was painful for her!!!!!)

As a result of hounding from my Mum and music teachers, I felt like I was a lazy music student, and not serious! Also, they all told me how talented I was! That did not help because I was then expected to do more! And I felt the pressure!!!!!!!

The possible impact of this on my life has been that I have often felt like a half arsed muso! That I was slack, lazy, not committed and I often question my ability and talent! While there are other factors that come into this (like being sensitive and anxious) the words, lines and intentions from people will always be there!

The good thing for me is I have reflected a lot on these things and learn from how I connect with myself, my own children and music students! If I have even the slightest inkling of me being “pushy” with my kids or students, I’m aware of this! I still give them direction but I don’t say or act in ways where they can be impacted by unnecessary criticism. Different from constructive criticism!

How constructive is, “ you are not a good player because you don’t practice enough or take this seriously”? Like really? It might be seen as a good intention but what damage does that possibly do? I see, at least, this sentiment portrayed in many families with musical kids that “possibly” push to hard!

I have worked with people over the years who have struggled to want to play music as an adult. Their confidence to learn or play again has often been crushed by words and actions from important influencers (parents and teachers etc) in their lives.

What’s been your experience? It would be great to have a discussion for those who feel safe to share! This stuff can be painful! But we can break the cycle and rewrite the script…and sing a different song!!

This image sums up what we are talking about here!!!!

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