Aug 24 • General Discussion
How YOU'RE asking QUESTIONS is KILLING DEALS
alright guys, I need to give you all a reality check. i see this mistake EVERYWHERE, every GODDAMN person does it. in 99% of cases you apply it the wrong way and that's why people shut down, get defensive, and suddenly don't even want to talk anymore. and it's all about those questions you're asking... killing the deal before they even had a chance.
so... want the secret word that's killing your sets/closes?
"Why."
I know, I know, everyone tells you to "dig deeper", "find the real reason", and "get to the pain." and every time you do that, you drop a question like this:
- "Why aren't you interested?"
- “Why isn’t this working for you?”
- “Why do you feel stuck?”
You think' you're getting the real thoughts they have.
But in reality you're actually making people DEFENSIVE as hell.
Look... here's what I'm yapping about: imagine your friend asks, “Why did you do that?”
Instantly, even if you did nothing wrong, you feel like you need to justify yourself. It triggers that little fight or flight instinct (the croc brain again). People feel judged, feel like they did something wrong, or like they need to defend their choices... and when that happens in sales? Goodbye, rapport.
Here’s the game-changer (shoutout Chris Voss):
Stop asking WHY. Start asking HOW and WHAT:
- “How do you feel about the process so far?”
- “What about the previous solution didn’t work for you?”
- “How would you see this fitting into your routine?”
See the difference?
It’s open, it’s collaborative, and it pulls honest answers THRU curiosity, not interrogation.
When you switch to “how” and “what,” you cut through all the defensiveness and get real clarity. People open up, conversations flow, and setting (or closing) becomes painless.
The first time I ditched “why” and used this?
Guy literally went from arms crossed, giving one-word answers—to talking for ten minutes straight about his real problems. Suddenly, I wasn’t interrogating. I was working with him.
so... stop letting how you ask the question in the first place kill, your deals.
Ditch the "why" lean into calibrated questions, and watch what happens to your calls... (spoiler, you gonna see a big improvement)
This is YOUR daily dose of setting knowledge.
PS: Who’s got a story about a time “why” backfired on a call? Drop it so we can all learn.
P.P.S: What’s the best “how” or “what” question you’ve used that flipped a convo?
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How YOU'RE asking QUESTIONS is KILLING DEALS
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