Recently, I observed behavior from someone that really concerned me. I watched as they harshly interacted with someone, taking offense to something that was completely innocent, and in that moment, it became clear to me that they were still responding from a place of trauma. You can often tell where someone is in their healing by how they respond. When healing hasn’t taken place, trauma will speak for you. Scripture reminds us in Matthew 12:34 that “out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks.” In other words, your words will eventually reveal what your heart is trying to conceal. The truth is, you can’t hide what hasn’t been healed, especially not from someone who walks with the Holy Spirit. He reveals what we try to cover. And that’s why it’s better to be honest about where you are in your healing process than to pretend you’re whole while still bleeding on others. Here’s the hard truth, Sis: your purpose will wait for you, but people won’t. People are not called to stand in the line of fire of your unhealed wounds while you chase purpose. Healing is not optional, it’s necessary. Because when you pursue purpose without securing your identity, your trauma responses will expose you, and your behavior will push people away before your purpose ever has the chance to impact them. I'm not trying to change you or judge you, I'm just offereing you wisdom. Don’t rush into purpose while neglecting healing. Take the time to become whole. Because when your identity is secure and your heart is healed, your purpose won’t just be something you do, it will be something you can sustain without hurting the very people you’re called to help. #Tianastea☕️ #itsteatime Tiana's Tea and Tiana's Tea Public Access

🌸✨ Weekly Challenge: Letter to Your Former Self ✨🌸 Ladies, this week’s challenge is deeply personal and incredibly powerful. 💕 Part of becoming the woman God designed you to be…is forgiving the woman who filled the space before you knew who you were. There is a version of you that: • didn’t know better• was trying to survive• made decisions from pain• tolerated what she shouldn’t have• was operating from broken or unclear identity and instead of judging her…this week, we are going to honor, forgive, and release her. ✍🏽 Your Assignment: Write a Letter to Your Former Self This letter should be real, honest, and personal.Not perfect. Not filtered. Just truth. 💔 1. Acknowledge Her Start by recognizing who she was: • What was she going through?• What was she carrying?• What did she believe about herself? 👉 “I see you… I see how hard you were trying…” 💛 2. Forgive Her Now extend grace: • Forgive her for the decisions she made• Forgive her for what she didn’t know• Forgive her for what she allowed 👉 “I forgive you for…” 🌸 3. Thank & Release Her This is the most important part. • Thank her for surviving• Thank her for getting you to this point• Then release her 👉 “Thank you for getting me here… but I release you. I am no longer her.” 🌿 After You Write Your Letter (Optional but Powerful) • Read it out loud• Pray over it• Or tear it up as a symbol of release 🔥 Why This Matters You cannot fully walk in your new identity while holding onto your old version of yourself. This is your moment to let her go…so you can fully become HER. 💕 Take your time with this. Be honest. Be free. I’m so proud of you. 🌸✨

Sometimes the wounds that shape us the most are not loud or dramatic. They are quiet experiences that happen early in life, often in the places where we first learned what love, safety, and connection were supposed to feel like. A father fracture or mother fracture refers to the emotional wounds that develop when a parent is absent, inconsistent, unsafe, overly critical, emotionally unavailable, or unable to provide the nurturing and protection a child needs. These fractures do not always come from intentional harm. Many parents were simply carrying wounds of their own. But to a child, the impact is still real. In early childhood, these fractures can look like: • feeling unseen or emotionally unsupported • learning to suppress feelings to avoid conflict • trying to earn love through performance or perfection • growing up too quickly and becoming “the strong one” • developing fear of rejection or abandonment Children naturally look to their parents to understand who they are and how relationships work. When that foundation is fractured, it can quietly shape how we relate to others later in life. A father fracture often affects how a woman relates to men. She may deeply desire love and protection, yet struggle to trust it when it appears. She may tolerate unhealthy behavior in relationships because part of her still longs for the validation or presence she once needed from her father. Sometimes it can show up as choosing emotionally unavailable partners, overextending to prove her worth, or struggling to feel safe receiving love. A mother fracture often affects how a woman relates to other women. If a woman experienced criticism, emotional distance, competition, or instability in her relationship with her mother, she may unconsciously approach female relationships with caution. She may struggle to trust women, feel guarded in sisterhood, or find it difficult to believe that women can genuinely support and celebrate one another. These fractures can also influence how we make choices and decisions.

Here is the replay of our last interactive class as we discussed our purpose map...