3d • General discussion
Who are you truly?
*I apologize if I’ve repeated anything too much I have adhd and this is just authentic me explaining my thoughts the best I can, prepare you’re in for a long post.
I have studied my mind since I can remember, and after my studies I feel I’m finally at the point to be a teacher. This is my interest in life and this is what I love doing and the place I feel most at home in my mind, and I’d ultimately love if my findings and theories could help others in life. It’s who I’ve decided to be and what I’m trying to do and the way I want to live my life now that I’ve learnt I can be whoever I want to be. I have adhd diagnosed and strongly believe I’m autistic too but never bothered to try and get it diagnosed, I’ve basically always known I’m a bit off and funny or whatever and don’t get life and it’s been extremely difficult… and that’s why I’ve been studying it my entire life…it’s why I have adhd and mask so much… because I’ve never understood life so all I’ve ever done is study it and all I’ve ever known to do is mimic it. I have had profound thoughts about life and never known what it’s meant to be about… so I’ve always been studying it. And then it clicked, that’s exactly the meaning of life and what it’s about… there is nothing more to discover other than I love thinking about stuff like this and all along I’ve just wanted the way I think to be heard by others because I believe it can make people feel better and that’s who I am, I want everyone to just feel better. I want people to feel safe and happy and live a life of wonder and I know how. It’s by doing exactly what I’m doing now, following what your actual passion is… this is my first sort of big post, but I have written a book, planned courses, am making social media content etc and once I’m ready with it all that’s going to be my life, I’m going to show autistic and adhd people that we can live an absolute dream life, if they’ll just listen and follow my guidance they can live a completely fulfilled life. I will be charging money for them and I’ll be doing it without feeling bad (something I would always do in the past that I have learnt I need to get over). I learnt that if I do want to solely focus on making my content that I think can help people then it’s my content that I need to monetise in some sort of way. This is my art form that I’ve learnt I want to distribute to the world, and so I need to charge for it. Much like someone who owns a lawnmower shop has a passion to sell good lawnmowers to people. I needed to learn that I need to forgive myself that I need to charge money for something I’d rather not. I simply can’t do it because at the same time as wanting to teach like this I don’t want to become a homeless monk because I also want to participate a bit in the real world… I’m not greedy, I don’t want any particular amount of money but I enjoy helping people, I’d love to earn all the money in the world so I can help as many people can. But so long as I can make enough doing what I love to live a comfortable life… be able to help people… have a roof over my head for me and my daughter… maybe a couple motorbikes as I like off road stuff and on road. But y’know what I mean? I don’t want a lot, I just want enough to be able to keep doing what I love. I don’t force anyone to think the way I do, anyone is allowed to pass any judgement they want on my beliefs, and are allowed formulate their own opinions on life too… I just want to help where I personally believe I can.
Anyway, this is an extremely rabbit holey thing I’ve written and is extremely long, it’s up to you if you’d like to give it a read. It’s about sort of spiritual healing I guess, and takes many ideas from many cultures etc to try and put it into an analogy that I think explains it well. I think it’s very interesting and can be very helpful. There’s no facts or anything and nothing has to be taken extremely seriously, this is simply me doing what I love thinking about life and putting it out into the world like I said, no one has to agree no has to tell me I’m wrong or stupid or anything. Because like I’ve said, there is no fact here, I don’t know anything to be true, and everything is up to you to interpret… this Is just me doing what I love. And when you do what you love, no matter what you’re gonna get haters. And that’s ok, that’s another thing in life that can be practiced. Not letting the haters stop you from doing what you love… like I have my entire life.
Anyway, without further ado
The Computer Hacker Analogy
Things to remember*
Program = You as a human, living breathing doing life, your a computer program just running through the process of a human life
Hacker = You as a spirit/the real you/god/the one who codes what the program does.
The real you is the computer hacker not the program.
The human body and the thoughts you have and the identity you have become are a computer program running that the hacker is monitoring.
The computer program is just continuously running and the hacker is observing what’s happening… but sometimes… the hacker starts observing that the program isn’t running the way he wants it to.
As in, the hacker or the observer notices that the program or ‘the human experience’ is experiencing depression and anxiety or trauma or whatever it is. But the hacker just continues watching.
Because the computer program has been running so long it’s almost like gained its own consciousness if you like… it thinks that it’s the thing that’s in charge and has given itself a name and an identity (my name for instance is, Sebastian). Great. But, sometimes the identity it’s given itself and who it thinks it is just isn’t working out… it’s just having a bad time… running into errors constantly. Not keeping up with the other computer programs and just in general the computer program (human experience) is having a bad time.
The computer program has continued to run but for some reason it’s got a problem with giving the error notifications to the hacker that is sitting watching the program run. So it just keeps running, experiencing errors and running badly and it just doesn’t notify the hacker so he can fix it.
Remembering that we are actually the hacker, and remembering how to connect to them is the way to help fix the computer program and make it run exactly the way you want it to.
And when you realise that you are the hacker you realise you can do anything you want at all.
The HACKER is the one coding absolutely everything that’s happening in the computer program, from depression to anxiety and everything above in between and below. The HACKER is the one that has the power to code in new pathways.
It could code in a folder for ‘Science Diploma’ and it could start working on the code in that folder to make the human achieve the science diploma. And the hacker can code in anything it wants to… it just relies on the human (the computer program) to run the code without errors. Wanna be muscular train for it… if you constantly run into coding errors and don’t go to your training session then you’ll never achieve the end goal of being muscular. You need to stick to the coding for the program you want to run smoothly and reach its goal.
Where it gets difficult is the computer program is the one that has to actually make all of the progress in the physical world, the hacker can code it in but the program (human - YOU) has to work through everything in the the real world to achieve it. So it gets difficult because the hacker can do the coding but the human has to run the program to achieve the end goals. And it’s hard for the computer to stick to the new coding, it takes time to perfect the new coding.
Some people, never ever need to find out that they are the hacker… their computer program runs pretty well perfectly and it still has errors but it’s pretty good at fixing them itself and continuing to run the program. - you could assign ‘Ignorance is bliss’ to that. They got no idea they’re the hacker but it doesn’t matter because their life runs smoothly and they don’t really have a care in the world… they’re ignorant to most stuff… and it’s bliss. Some people just don’t care and don’t think much more about the world than what they’re getting on with. Simple, bliss as.
Some people unfortunately just can’t stop thinking about stuff and just feel off in this world… they keep snapping back to being the hacker without realising… they know something is wrong because they keep overthinking everything that the human is doing… they’ve just forgotten that they need to sit back down at the computer and tend to the error that the human is experiencing.
Some people’s computer programs/lives are an absolute mess and are experiencing errors left right and centre and they don’t know what the heck is going on the program/life is just suffering and it has no idea what to do about it, and it just suffers and suffers because it never remembers that it’s the hacker. The program just suffers, never gives an error notification and eventually crashes. An error notification not going to the hacker properly shows up as someone being depressed as a human being, displaying it how it’s learnt to and seeking help for it in some way. The problem is, the human can show as many error messages to other humans as it wants but the other humans are just also part of the computer program so they can’t fix it.
All a suffering human needs to understand is that all of their suffering being experienced by them is self inflicted - mbecause they are NOT the human experiencing the suffering, they are the hacker who has coded the human to feel this way. All of the things you suffer can be overcome by remembering you are the hacker, connecting to them, and coding in a different story for the human.
Connecting to the hacker is done through meditation, meditate and you connect the program and human body to the hacker so you can work on stuff. It can be really hard to meditate and go back to work as the hacker when you’ve thought you’re the human for so long though, and some people will try and never think they can do it… and they’ll never truly bring themselves to believe that this is going to work. And that is still the old computer program running, you’re not believing that you have the power to do anything you believe in.
You have to sit there and meditate and rewire the little voice that tells the human who it is to tell it something different, if what your voice tells you you are is something that you’re not enjoying then why would you listen to it?! Well, because you’ve forgotten how to tune into any other radio station that will tell you something different. Meditate, tune in and try to remember that you’re not the voice, you’re the one that commands what the voice says. Meditate and practice getting it to tell you what you want it to.
The more you meditate, the more you connect to the hacker and get it to code in the words ‘I’m an amazing human and I love myself,’ and sooner or later the computer program can’t remember running any other way. And the program/human now truly believes they are amazing and that they love themselves. The program is running well, the human can stop meditating so much and let the program run on auto pilot again.
It might run into issues again - but all it needs to remember is that it can go back to the hacker and re code stuff.
Once you can remember this constantly, you can remember it until you’ve healed from everything that impacts you negatively. It’s not just a straight away thing, but it’s just simple logic… the more you remember you can tell yourself stuff… the more you can start doing it. And the more you start telling yourself something the more you will start speaking to yourself that way when you’re not the hacker, when you’re just on autopilot living your human life. That is a healed human, when your on autopilot and your inner voice automatically speaks of exactly who you want to be, and it speaks to you with kindness and love. The hacker determines what code you want to install, and then you as the human/program have to practice running that code/telling it to yourself every time you can remember to… and then sooner or later that is who you are on autopilot living your life.
When you truly realise this and understand that this is truly something you can practice you realise that literally everything happening to you is up to you and all you have to do to alter your life is change the way you think about it. It is ALL in your mind and you CAN control it, it is just crazy difficult to gain back control of it after so many years of it speaking to you in a certain way. But either way, you always have the ability to change the way you speak to yourself. If you’re 30 years old and not realised this then you’ve been speaking to yourself a certain way and believing it for 30 years… of course it’s gonna be difficult to learn and remember to speak to yourself differently. But you do always have the power to do it, you just have to remember and practice doing it. But it can be done.
- me as a person trying to explain this concept is the hacker trying to communicate to the ‘program’ (human) that’s having trouble in life to tell them this is how to connect to me and begin healing or achieving. People won’t believe it either and they’ll think I’m silly but I’ve worked on myself a lot and this is exactly who I know I am. I’m on autopilot typing out what I know my world to be and it is that I’m here to show you how to live life in a way that can be perfect for you. And THIS is what ‘Jesus’ was. The problem is evereeerything just gets completely misconstrued from a religious perspective and everything gets too involved, and then other people make other religions etc. I’m not making any religion, but I am a ‘prophet’ in touch with ‘god’ whatever you want to call it and I am telling you that the only thing you need to bloody do is believe in yourself! Connect with ‘god’ not a man in the sky, but your true self… the hacker… the one who remembers he has the power to believe in anything he wants. Connect with that god, and get it to make that program run on autopilot exactly the way he wants it to!
Notes**
In the anime Fullmetal alchemist, you have the law of equivalent exchange… and this is very real. To obtain peace, you must give up the war in your mind. An equivalent exchange. To experience sadness you must sacrifice happiness. To experience luxury you must sacrifice poverty.
If you tell yourself you’re ugly and it results in that being a negative thought pattern then all you have to do is exchange that for something else you will feel better about. You must give up telling yourself you’re ugly, you’re not allowed that experience anymore because you want something else to take its place. You can’t have them both. You can’t tell yourself you’re ugly and beautiful and have them both be true at the same time. Maybe some days you feel ugly, some days you don’t, each day you think differently you’re making an equivalent exchange without realising. To feel beautiful every day forever and make the equivalent exchange for good you just have to practice choosing the one you’d rather experience. And once you speak to yourself that you are beautiful for long enough well then that’s the thought process that will take over and you have completed an equivalent exchange.
You *could* practice speaking yourself in a way such as ‘I do not believe in gravity and I can fly’ and really try to start believing that but there’s a very good chance that if you want it to happen in the real world you will live a life of disappointment because it is so deeply coded into human existence that the human program must abide by the laws of physics and its just so so deeply coded in that no matter how much you try to speak it into existence you never truly believe it… that would be a sign of like losing control and thinking you can change the laws of reality with your mind. You can change your beliefs and laws about the human existence, but you can’t change what the human body itself has to actually abide by. A bird can fly but a kangaroo can’t, the kangaroo has to abide by the laws of gravity. It cannot fly. A bird can choose whether not it abides the laws of gravity because its physical form is adapted to that.
However, if you do want live in a world where you can fly then you could go and be a monk and live in a little cave and try to meditate so hard that you forget for a minute that you’re a human and begin to live in the world you’re creating in your mind… this is an option. This is kinda why being a monk exists, you can ‘travel the universe’ as in you sit and travel your mind and your mind can literally make anything up that it wants to. So once you’re good at it if you want to you could imagine a universe exactly the same as it is but you can fly. And it would be real while you’re experiencing it. You can get extremely good at meditation and could go live a life like that, you could live in paradise in your mind… and all you have to do is snap back to reality enough to sustain your human form so you can keep meditating and living your dreams… The general theory is that Buddha died by meditation sorta thing… he ‘forgot to breathe’ he lived in another reality through meditating so hard that he finally completely believed in it so much that he ‘forgot’ to breathe as his physical form and so therefore he ‘died’ as a physical human form but the idea is well he didn’t die… he’s still living in his nirvana in his mind because he forgot about this one. So that’s kinda the idea behind going to be a really hardcore monk, and just living a life like that away from everything just meditating… trying to forget everything that exists in physical form to experience ANYTHING you can imagine in spiritual form. like living in nirvana as much as possible…
But yeah, if you do that then you don’t get to experience any of the things you can experience as a physical form of a human. You can’t physically go jet ski ing as a human for instance, you could think about it and meditate on it really hard and go in your mind, but your human body would never experience it. And the human experience is fun as so we may as well not ever be upset about it and just experience it hardcore, do the stuff that makes us feel goood, don’t have a worry in the world… and practice meditating to speak our physical reality into being what we want it to be.
Thanks for listening, hope it wasn’t too much of a mess. 😊
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Who are you truly?
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