2d • Share your Poems
Lovesickness
Why was I chosen to be love’s favorite drug and its strongest addiction?
Misused and abused, I was left confused in solitude as the longest needle crippled my vein and guided me into submission
The pain dealt pleasure that delivered me to delusion, deceiving me into believing that my contaminated bleeding was a natural affliction
My real eye conflicted, unable to realize that what I received was driving me further into infliction and steering my brain further into the lane of the insane
Cope had me holding on to hope that it wasn’t toxicity from my proximity filling my bloodstream with infections
I was taught love meant to give and receive unconditionally, yet instead of reciprocity my efforts were consistently met with lessons
Lesions forming around the many holes left from bullets, ecstasy layin’ next to me
Knife ingrained so deeply that you couldn’t even begin to pull it, pain tolerance testin’ me
Shit, I must be a masochist
Cause the rush from being attached to this had me begging for half assed acceptance and weightless validation like lavish gifts
And to add to this, it made me fall in love with Mary Jane who is the secretary
In a permanent state of February, love bombing was all around so I figured I would never worry
Until I was reminded by Aquarius waters that I was surrounded, silently drowning
Finding myself losing faith that I will ever be found
How did I even allow it to make me grovel on the ground?
Doubt corrupted my intuition and fear interrupted my heart’s conviction, so even if they did listen my voice made no sound
Hoarse from falling into patterns of victimhood from this system to which I was bound
No choice but to disperse into pieces of hurt, nursing surgical wounds when anesthesia had me high out my mind
Then the universe sent a different vision, arriving in divine timing with a sparkle in his eyes and a smile that shines
I always fantasized about rehab, revitalized yet too damaged to see what was happening in front of me instead of behind
Blinded and elusive to true love I deserved, I surrendered to confusion versus being lucid
Reserved, I was too stupid to realize that I had been struck by cupid
Was it luck that his arrow had gotten stuck and made him fall for me?
Still trapped between this is the real thing and a nightmare balled into a dream
When you removed it I remained whole, my heart molded to speak that it’s exactly as it seems
Freeing me from the shackles of being a fiend, it was those eyes that cleansed my soul and that smile that made me gleam
The love that was sick from generation curses, now cured by angelic remedies
Melodies from heaven whose rain released me from pain, loved me unconditionally, and turned my traumas into a distant memory
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Lovesickness
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