Jan 4 (edited) • LESSONS TAKE BACK YOUR POWER
Lesson 7- The Search for your Authentic Self
Let’s do this gently and honestly.... let's start with Breathwork
1) Centering breath + visualization (60 seconds)
Take a slow inhale through your nose for 4… hold for 2… and exhale for 6.Again: inhale 4… hold 2… exhale 6. Now imagine you’re standing barefoot on warm earth at sunrise. With each exhale, your shoulders soften. With each inhale, the light warms your chest—like a quiet “yes” returning to you.
2) What “authentic self” usually means (in plain terms)
Your authentic self is rarely something you create. It’s what’s left when you stop performing, appeasing, proving, and bracing. Wayne Dyer would call it pulling your own strings—not letting other people’s approval, guilt, or expectations move you like a puppet. Eckhart Tolle would point to the stillness beneath the noise: the part of you that’s aware, steady, and already whole.
3) A quick self-check: where did you leave yourself?
Take one breath and answer softly (out loud or in your mind):
- Where in my life am I “editing” myself the most?(With a partner? Family? Work? Friends?)
- What emotion shows up when I stop editing?(Fear? Shame? Grief? Anger? Relief?)
- What am I afraid would happen if I were fully me?
If anything feels tender, pause and take one slow exhale. That tenderness is often the doorway.
4) The “True Self vs. Adapted Self” map (Bradshaw-inspired)
John Bradshaw taught that many of us develop a false self to survive—especially if love felt conditional. So let’s identify yours without judgment.
Adapted self signs:
- people-pleasing, over-explaining, perfectionism
- scanning for others’ reactions
- feeling guilty for having needs
- saying yes when your body says no
Authentic self signals (often quieter):
- a grounded “no” without drama
- simple preferences (music, food, pace, solitude)
- clean desires (create, rest, connect, learn)
- a body that feels more settled than tight
Put a hand on your chest and ask: “What do I know is true… even if I’m scared to admit it?”Wait for the first simple sentence. That’s usually the real one.
5) A practice to reconnect today (10 minutes)
The Three Doors Practice
- Door of the Body (2 minutes): Scan from forehead to belly. Where is the tension? Breathe into it. Say: “I’m listening.”
- Door of the Heart (4 minutes): Write 3 sentences starting with: My feelings....
- Door of Integrity (4 minutes): Choose one small, aligned action you can do today that let's you freely exhale.
6) A simple mantra for the week
When you feel pulled into emotion performance, Say out loud: “I return to my true self now. "Then exhale longer than you inhale. (That tells your nervous system you’re feeling safe.)
7) A tiny “ritual” to make it real
Tonight, write on a slip of paper: "I release the role of __________.” (the pleaser, the achiever, the fixer, the strong one) Fold it. Place it under a glass of water or near a candle for a moment of reverence. Whisper: "Thank you for protecting me. I’m ready to live from truth now and want my Authentic Self to rise.” (You can discard it later—this is about present moment intention.)
Make sure you Journal what your answers are so you can review them often.
For now, a closing Metaphysic Blessing:
May you feel the quiet strength of Winter earth beneath you—steady, patient, unwavering. May what is false, fall away like old Fall leaves, and may what is true rise in your Spirit like Sunrise—warm, inevitable, and kind. You are not lost. You are BECOMING!
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Lesson 7- The Search for your Authentic Self
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