About a week before the countdown.
Night before last, I finally told her. I canāt say she was surprised, more hurt that I lied for as long as I did. But I couldnāt hide the scattered thoughts, the severe depression, and a very real thoughs of suicide that come with the use of stimulants. I feel ashamed. Ashamed that. Iām going through this again. I thought I knew better. Iāve been through this before. Either way itās gonna come to an end and itās gonna come to an end real fast. I canāt take it. I canāt handle the pressure. I need to get off this shit. So Iāve decided that Iām gonna do a 30 day countdown while I get the bike registered the proper portable charging equipment and the battery reserve Iāll need to attempt to drive 30 miles an hour on a very small minibike from Michigan to Florida then back home. taking all back roads. Iām doing this all while leaving drugs, nicotine and marijuana behind. Thatās right mother in law. Weed too! lol Iām doing this because itās gonna be tough. Iām making myself struggle hard enough to never forget why Iām doing it in the first place. Iām gonna post daily. So everyone can see my transformation. And hope that it helps someone else out there watching me following my journey on my road to recovery.