Feb 19 • THE MIRROR
The trigger map
Yesterday, I was helping my daughter get ready for cheerleading practice and I’ve noticed I always feel triggered when my daughter only wants my wife to help her when we’re both home. Reflecting on this I believe a part of me feels inadequate and it wants to prove itself but not to prove it to myself, I try and prove it to my wife that I can do things without her help. This part hasn’t fully owned yet that proving this to myself is more important than proving to others and it feels like an insecurity that I’m trying to hide. The part that reacted was the boy and just continued to go back and forth with my daughter as to why my wife can’t do it but I’m here to help (not in a good tone either and was matching energy). The grounded man now would take a breath and get back in my body and state more calmly that I’m available to do this but mommy cannot right now because she’s sick. Show compassion to her that I know it can be difficult for mommy to not be able to do our hair today and take a second to give her a hug or sit with her in her strong emotions.
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The trigger map
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