You do not manipulate others. You change yourself.
Neville said it clearly: "There is no one to change but self."
Think about it.
I have two children and I love them with everything I am. I am married, and in my eyes my husband is the best man in the world. That's why I chose to spend my life with him.
But to you, the person reading this post, they are simply people you don't know. Even if you met them, you would never see them exactly as I do.
Why?
Because you would be looking through your lens, not mine.
The same person can be loved by one, disliked by another, admired by one, ignored by another. The person didn't change. The perception did.
This is what Neville was trying to teach.
Your experience of people is filtered through your assumptions, beliefs, expectations, and the meaning you give them.
When Neville spoke about changing self, he wasn't talking about controlling minds. He was talking about changing the lens through which you see the world.
Change the lens, and the world you experience through it changes too.
So before trying to change someone else, ask yourself:
What am I assuming about them that I keep proving true?