Change the narrative
How to stop hating the past and change the narrative.
So many people hate their past because all they can see is the trauma. The pain. The moments that broke them.
And I understand that deeply — because not long ago, I was one of them.
But let’s pause for a moment and imagine a life without pain.
No loss.
No fear.
No disappointment.
No moments that forced you inward.
Would that past ever produce a strong, conscious, wise, fulfilled being?
Neville reminds us that states are learned through experience. Consciousness awakens through contrast. Without pressure, awareness remains asleep. Without suffering, depth is never born.
We often reject the very experiences that shaped our capacity to understand life, self, and others. We resent the moments that forced us to grow, even though they are the reason we can now recognize states, shift identity, and consciously choose who we are.
Yes, it hurt.
Yes, it changed you.
But it also initiated you.
From Neville’s perspective, your past was not a mistake — it was the perfect series of states required to awaken the version of you who can now assume deliberately, love consciously, and live awake.
The past was never punishing you.
It was moving you toward yourself.
So today, change the narrative.
Instead of grieving what happened, honor what was revealed.
Instead of hating who you were, love the intelligence that carried you through it.
When you truly understand this, the past stops being a wound — and becomes proof of your becoming.
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Ioana Dobos
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Change the narrative
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