I just need to put this out there as a way to get it out of my head.
I currently have a full time job as an engineer. This job is the majority of my family's income. I have wanted to leave engineering for a while. I've tried different things but have not gained enough traction to make the change. I've uncovered that the fear of losing my job (which I have before) is preventing me from being successful in any of the other ventures I've tried. My fear is if my employer finds out that I am working on something else they will get rid of me before I have the means to provide for my family. I get the feeling my boss can be vindictive. Because I am fearful of this possibility, I do some work, but not enough to create real change. I am not unrealistic that building a business that can sustain my family's needs will take time. I have the feeling like I need to keep this in the shadows so my employer doesn't find out and question me. That, i know, will not allow me to be successful.