What gets in the way of you achieving your goals?

What's good everyone? I hope you are all having a top Saturday and taking a step to being your best you - I appreciate this community, reading your posts, responses and support for each other is special to me!❤️💫.

It is good to see you putting your goals and challenges out there. 🚀📈🏆

Before I write a post I like to have a read about what you guys are talking about!

When writing my goals I found my motivation and ability achieve the goal isn't normally the reason they are challenging. The challenges come from the obstacles, habits and people in my environment, these were serious predictors of my outcome. When making changes and setting new goals have a think about what in your environment is making it harder for you to achieve the results you want and what does not making the change offer you!

The enthusiasm and motivation is great in the beginning then I would fall off and not understand why!

Identify and removing barriers will make achieving your goals much easier but you will face resistance, be prepared for this and this is ok.

Here is an example - When I decided to go sober some of the reasons it would not happen was because of the environment's I would put myself in. Early in the week I would say I am not drinking and mean it, then Friday would come around and I would go out with the same people into the same environment and order the none alcoholic beers and drinks. This would become a taking point, I had to defend why I wasn't drinking and a massive fuss was made every time I said I no. I was the butt of jokes and because that was not the part of their plan as they did not want me to change, they wanted the version of me that suited them, my change impacted them too! (This is way you have to make the change for you, because it is your time and your journey!).

My will power and reasons why would stand strong for most of it, my experience showed me that other forces were at play. As the night went on my social battery would drain rapidly as everyone got more pissed the conversation would deteriorate, the music would get louder, situations would get more awkward and it would feel SO OVERWHELMING!

After failing a few times I realised what purpose drinking was serving for me. It was clear to understand why it was hard to achieve my not drinking goal. In these situations it felt like drinking was serving me:-

It gave me energy to stay up later and longer.

It allowed to feel relaxed and engage in those environments and conversations.

It connected me to those people and places that were familiar and at the time and all I knew.

It allowed me to fit as that is where I spent my time and where I existed.

Before I could really quit, I understood what drink was doing for me in some situations and it was these same situations where I would end up drinking. I had some tough choices to make. I knew I wanted to give up, I would feel even worse on those mornings waking up after saying I wasn't going to drink.

Then I reminded myself of the reasons I did not want to drink, I hated myself, what I had become, I nearly lost a business, I was unhappy, unfulfilled and just felt like I was existing. I wanted to reach my full potential and be a better me and have a better quality of life and drinking was simply getting in the way of that. When I looked at what those situations were costing me I knew had to change how I navigated being in those situations before I gave them up completely was i had much better alternatives.

Change the situation, don't be a nominated driver - this didn't give me the space to leave when it was my time to go or when my social battery died. I had to wait until everyone was ready 🤢

Find an ally - it is so much easier when you are with someone with the same goal.🏆

Do you even like the environment, I found that without the drink I didn't like some of the places, I would rather be have the energy to do something that was in line with my goals. 📈

Create new environments that you exist in without drinking - to be social and connect to people, playing sport allowed a better alternative. 🎾

I know this was a longer post but it important you know the truth about making a change, If the thing you are trying to change offers you some benefits it is important you find out what they are so you can find replacements or alternatives because familiar environments would offer me comfort and lead me down the same path.

Action: Look at your goals and think about how not completing them serves you and why you engage in the whatever it is that you want to change in the first place. Have a think about the obstacles and challenges surrounding your goals and how to remove them. Removing the barriers will help you clearly see that it is not just about your ability, your current environment counts too!

Have a top weekend

Scott

❤️

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