https://youtu.be/Frgn9Rjwprc?si=cW3--K8sc1gyy2-n

Part of healing is allowing ourselves to feel all our feelings, including pain, and remembering that bumps in the road are a part of the process. When we believe this, we can get back up more easily. Resilience is the ability to bounce back after adversity. Resilience building supports us to manage adversity. We have to celebrate our successes and mourn our losses… we have to stop and focus on our intent and the direction we want to travel…or the decision making path we want to follow… It’s not about turning left or right… it’s about weighing out the risk versus rewards, to the consequences calling with our beliefs and values… is this action likely to allow us to achieve what we are working towards, or hinder us? Examples of Resilience - Trying to take a positive perspective on situations. - Viewing challenges as learning opportunities. - Regulating emotions and expressing feelings in appropriate ways. - Focusing on the things you can control instead of dwelling on what you cannot change. - Recognizing that cognitive distortions are false. 1. Purpose creates focus It has been wisely noted by people in the past that you can think about anything...but you cannot think about everything! 2. Purpose triggers decisions: what am I doing? What could I be doing? 3. Purpose shapes thinking… regular reflection, assessing areas of our life worth sustaining and improving. 4. Purpose stimulates activity: seeking to maintain an active engagement in our daily lives. Avoiding inactivity and isolation. This helps us to remain focused. 5. Purpose provides a benchmark…SMART Goals… The acronym SMART stands for Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, and Time-bound, each with guidelines for effective goal setting. - Specific: Set real numbers with real deadlines; avoid general statements like "more visitors". - Measurable: Ensure goals are trackable, not hidden behind buzzwords like "brand engagement".  - Attainable: Work towards goals that are challenging yet possible, not overly ambitious like "take over the world". - Realistic & Time-bound: Be honest about capabilities and set a clear deadline, avoiding indefinite timelines. 

What are you looking for?? Are you looking to “get over it”, or HEAL? Part of healing is allowing ourselves to feel all our feelings, including pain, and remembering that bumps in the road are a part of the process. Stuffing it down, is avoiding the inevitable pain! It leaves it unfinished….instead of experiencing it on our terms…and putting it behind us! It’s imperative we address problems… they don’t go away, and certainly do not get better because we put them off!! It’s crucial, we allow ourselves freedom to experience and explore our feelings and emotions in safety and to do so of our choosing… rather than as a reaction!! When we believe this, we can get back up more easily. Resilience is the ability to bounce back after adversity. Resilience building supports us to manage adversity. We have to celebrate our successes and mourn our losses… we have to stop and focus on our intent and the direction we want to travel…or the decision making path we want to follow… It’s not about turning left or right… it’s about weighing out the risk versus rewards, are the consequences aligning with our beliefs and values… is this action likely to allow us to achieve what we are working towards, or hinder us? Resilience - Trying to take a positive perspective on situations. - Viewing challenges as learning opportunities. - Regulating emotions and expressing feelings in appropriate ways. - Focusing on the things you can control instead of dwelling on what you cannot change. - Recognizing that cognitive distortions are false. 1. Purpose creates focus It has been wisely noted by people in the past that you can think about anything...but you cannot think about everything! 2. Purpose triggers decisions 3. Purpose shapes thinking 4. Purpose stimulates activity 5. Purpose provides a benchmark As always… stay out of that rearview mirror… except for brief check-ins… you can keep looking back when you’re forward focused!! Stick to the plan… and LIVE forward focused, on purpose!!

"If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change" is a quote by Dr. Wayne Dyer, meaning your perception shapes your reality, turning challenges into opportunities, negatives into positives, and transforming your entire experience of life by altering your mindset, beliefs, and focus, making you feel empowered rather than victimized. The core meaning - Perception is key: Your attitude and internal filter determine how you experience the world, not necessarily the world itself. - Reality shifts: Changing your perspective doesn't change the external event, but it changes your experience of it, making it feel different (e.g., frustration with rain becomes a chance to relax).  How it works in practice - Challenges become growth: Instead of seeing a problem as a roadblock, you see it as preparation or a chance to learn. - Negativity transforms: Choosing to find good, even when it's difficult, shifts you from feeling overwhelmed to feeling capable. - Empowerment through choice: You realize you can't control all events, but you always control your response, giving you power over your life.  Examples - Job loss: Instead of mourning, you view it as an opportunity to find a better job or follow a passion. - Being stuck late: Instead of frustration, you see a chance to connect with a colleague or reflect. 

You’re Out of Control People need control to feel safe, secure, and in charge of their lives, especially when dealing with anxiety, fear, or past trauma. This need can stem from a desire to create certainty in an uncertain world, manage fear of negative outcomes, or cope with feelings of helplessness. While a moderate desire for control is normal, an excessive need can lead to negative outcomes in relationships and personal well-being. Causes of the need for control - Anxiety and fear: The desire to control situations is often a response to anxiety, as it can create a sense of certainty and prevent things from going wrong.  - Past trauma: Traumatic experiences can lead to a deep-seated need for control, as controlling one's environment may be an unconscious effort to protect oneself from experiencing similar pain again.  - Learned behavior: Observing and internalizing controlling behaviors from others, or growing up in an environment where control was a common response, can lead to this need.  - Low self-esteem and insecurity: A lack of self-worth can make individuals feel vulnerable, and they may try to gain a sense of power or value through controlling others or situations.  - Perfectionism: The belief that things must be done in a perfect or specific way can drive a need for control, as it's a way to ensure outcomes meet an impossibly high standard.