🕰️ 40+ Years in the Making · 𝙂𝙊𝙊𝙎𝙄𝙁𝙔 🍓🐛🦋🌈⭐️🩷

Dinka Salvador

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19h • ⭐️ Wins

🕰️ 40+ Years in the Making

Anti-Blitz style 😎

I want to share a very personal story with you all.

Grab a box of tissues and make yourself comfortable 🤧

By the time my mom came home from the hospital with me after my birth, my parents were already separated.

I have no memory of the three of us together. There might be a picture or two somewhere, but that's all.

My dad battled alcohol addiction for most of his adult life. My mom had to do what was best for me, she could raise me on her own, but she couldn’t have him around. It was a hard choice, no doubt.

She never spoke badly about my dad. NEVER. In fact, she genuinely wanted me to have a relationship with him. But there were many promises, and not so many of them were kept.

My dad remarried, and I have three half-siblings, six, ten, and sixteen years younger than me. Our relationship is minimal, if anything at all.

Fast forward to last year, I found the book It Didn't Start With You by Mark Wolynn. It made me realize how deeply family trauma is passed down through generations, until someone is brave enough to face it.

The book includes a list of questions designed to uncover hidden family wounds. I sent the questions to both of my parents, wanting to unearth any skeletons in the closet. The questions were deeply personal. While I was curious about both their responses, I didn’t expect huge surprises from my mom’s side, I had spent my entire childhood with her. But my dad’s past? I knew nothing about it.

Not only was he incredibly cooperative, but I also discovered he’s an amazing writer. His emails started pouring in, one after another, written so beautifully, like a novel. And it was all new information for me. Slowly, we started talking.

At one point, there was a pause in communication. I sent him a message, asking when I could expect the next chapter. He told me he was working on something else for me and asked me to be patient.

A few days later, I received an eight-page letter his entire life story, told through the lens of his relationships, including his relationship with my mother. It was so raw and well-written that I could feel the heartache in every word. It was intense.

That’s when I learned that, at one point, my mother had saved his life. When he had lost all hope and attempted suicide, she was the one who stopped him. She was already pregnant with me.

The day I read his letter was so heavy. I cried so much but in a healing way.

A few weeks later, my dad sent me a message asking for my mom’s phone number. That same day, I was on the phone with my mom when she casually mentioned that my dad had called her.

Things moved quickly from there. Two days later, they arranged to meet. My dad was attending an AA meeting in the town where my mom lives.

They spent the entire day together and even sent me a picture of the two of them.

My dad is now 73 years old, and he has been sober for more than five years (he knows the exact number of days).

My heart is overflowing with joy for both of them. That they had the chance to reconnect, even after so many years. The last time they saw each other was at my high school graduation 25 years ago.

I truly believe that my small act of sending those questions created a ripple effect that led to this reunion.

Why am I sharing this? Because my heart is full! Because I am proud of my dad!

And because I hope this gives hope to anyone who longs to reconnect with a family member.

It took 40+ years, but where there’s a will, there’s a way.

I am incredibly proud to be the child of these two people. 🥰

😭

🫶🏻

❤️‍🩹

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