Today I turn 35, and I try to use my birthday wish wisely. If you have benefitted from my content in the time since you found me, my shameless ask is to leave me a rating on my Spotify podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/00yIunwOpcCymvruv1FL7o?si=zss8OpXiTsOIp9W1kBZeyg Attached is the screen shot for the button to tap (3 dots near the top) It’s been a really fun project for me the past few years, I’m almost up to episode 100. Ratings could make a huge difference as I try to get my book proposal sold to a publisher this month! Thank you in advance if you accept my request. Thank you for your belief in me to teach invisible labor:)

Hearing for first time? Have the book, gathering dust? Started, stopped Read a fair amount, haven’t implemented cards Had 1 talk with cards, and never revisited? Revisiting consistently

If you haven't seen this yet, I recommend giving it a watch • How early habits can shape our understanding of sex and intimacy • The difference between feeling an urge and truly needing physical intimacy • How rethinking these patterns helped foster a deeper connection with my partner • And why challenging long-held beliefs about masculinity and physical need matters

Yesterday I had a long convo with Alyssa, she discovered that she had been slowly feeling a “smoldering” anger towards me… for a long time. I knew there were a lot of moments when she seemed more angry than I would expect, and I often aim to assume and look for where I can take accountability, sometimes I can assume a lot some is a little harder. The other night she needed some space, she needed alone time, no hesitation, I took over the rest of the night, luckily things went smooth which is not 100% of the time. That night she said she still felt that smoldering anger but actually had no where to direct it towards me yet her anger felt aimed at me. It forced her to be introspective as she had no reason for me seamlessly taking over. She concluded after a multi day consideration, that she was FEELING 2nd hand anger, covering up her shame. She felt shame that she wasn’t doing enough because that night I successfully did it all, cooked, cleaned, bathtime, bed time routine. When I was doing the work it took away her ability/cultural-training that she should be a martyr. This gave me hope as I often think I’m doing everything I can, to be an equal partner, and still often feel so short. It was such a win to know that some times her own culturally inflicted shame was the cause. I don’t expect her to no flip a switch and notice everytime she is in a shame-based anger. But we talked about what I can do to help her be aware. She encouraged: “Is there something happening for you?” Which gives her some safe space to share emotions if they are there or if I’m grasping at a misperception.

Video Below is to answer FAQ's: -Can I just read the book? -What happens in the program? -What is the environment like? -What are the benefits of taking the program? 2nd and 3rd Video are testimonials from the Program