Hey everyone, I used to frequent this group a lot and haven't been on since probably early March/April. After my session with Ryan a couple of years ago now, I felt really great and did improve my life and situation a lot. I then went through a redundancy last year and was forced to move back in with my folks where a lot of my issues probably stemmed from. Well really it was from my older brother but the way they never did anything about it and gave him special treatment despite his abuse filled me with a lot of trapped resentment on top of everything else. That's a super basic overview as this post isn't about that, but not having any money and being "Trapped" in the home where I used to be this almost mute terrified child/Adolescent really messed me up temporarily this year and last. Since last September I have been completing a hypnotherapy course here in England, I had to travel about an hour for an intensive weekend in person teaching and then do other stuff online. This was such a great group of positive people and between September to around spring time it was like a lifeline. I needed these people more than I should have as cutting ties with old friends for negativity kind of left me very lonely (But I don't regret that) But things started to very slowly get better from around May, sometimes things got better only for something else to happen that ruined the original good thing. Case in point I got a nice easy part time job that payed me weekly and they just got rid of me because who knows. I met a few girls who ended up ghosting me too, but I knew I wasn't in the best place mentally anyway. But eventually I found work for an actual good company,(Only a month ago) its not sales its care which is great for part time work (I was so over the sales environment it wasn't really me, plus their obsession with technology that I didn't care about xD) I've also done all the hard work on the hypnotherapy course so I'm pretty much passed! Now I have to start thinking about how I'm going to put myself out there, which is really exciting.

So I have recommended this to a few people I know that have issues similar to mine and they seem afraid of this. One was proud to not be able to change and simply isn't going to do this. His personality has changed radically since rehab (proud/narcissistic) and I believe its to avoid dealing with his shame issues. Is this people avoiding pain/unknown and seeking pleasure/known?

I'll be finally moving out on my own this month, which means more time and freedom to clear my subconscious. I just purchased the SOS course and will go through it once I get into my new apartment. I learned through Ryan's streams how valuable an emotionally healthy mind is so that's why I'm making a big investment into this. I definitely know I will need a one-on-one session, if not multiple sessions. So I just wanted to update you guys since I haven't been active for a while. I'm really looking forward to the future!

Why do people think that taking drugs and alcohol is the only way for them to feel authentic and themselves?

In terms of promising the inner child that you will be there for him, protect him etc. Why even when I made the promise, why do I still make mistakes? Sometimes where some people speak out of turn, I don't always feel the need to stop it then and there, sometimes I wait, do it on my own time. But in there moments where I know I let him down/not being there for him in that moment e.g. eating bad food, not being productive, not taking action on my goals or even procrastinating. Why do I still make mistakes and feel i'm not taking care of him even when I made the promise?