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Owned by Rachel
A space to move from survival-based relating to secure intimacy through healthy conflict, repair, ownership, and growth.
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194.8k members • Free
7 contributions to LevelUp Collective
Feb 17 •
👋 Introduce Yourself — Let’s Build Intentionally
Welcome to LevelUp Collective. This is a space for adults who are ready to grow in how they relate — not blame, not diagnose, not dissect other people. Before we go anywhere, introduce yourself below 👇 Share whatever feels aligned and consider answering a few of these: • What brings you here right now? • What type of relationship are you most wanting to improve? (romantic, work, family, self) • When conflict happens, what’s your default pattern? (take over, withdraw, get sharp, over-explain, etc.) • What does “secure” feel like to you? • What is one relational pattern you’re ready to take ownership of? You don’t have to overshare. You don’t have to perform. This isn’t about being perfect, it’s about being willing. And willingness is powerful. 👇
0 likes • 18d
@Kristina Ziska, welcome. Happy to have you in here. 🙂 Thank you for being honest about what happens for you in conflict. Crying and needing space does not make you weak or “too much.” It usually means your body is getting overwhelmed and trying to find safety the best way it knows how. Wanting relief and wanting to bond more deeply with your boyfriend makes so much sense. The beautiful part is that you’re already aware of your pattern and awareness is where change starts. Leaving to calm down can actually be healthy when it’s done with intention, not as punishment or avoidance. The deeper work is learning how to regulate yourself and come back to the conversation with more safety, clarity, and truth. Curious to see how you find the masterclass and what you find helpful. Reach out with any question and hope to see you on the monthly live call happening soon. You’re in the right place. 💛
1 like • 7d
@Dev Dutt welcome. I’m really glad you’re here. What you shared is more common than people realize. When someone becomes extra friendly, overly accepting, or stays quiet instead of expressing what they really feel, that can sometimes be what trauma-informed spaces call “fawning” which is a protective pattern where your nervous system learns that keeping the peace is safer than telling the truth. This is not bad or weakness, it's actually a great sign your nervous system is doing what is designed to do and is doing an adaptation to 'keep you safe'. Your nervous systems only job is to keep you safe. In trauma and stress frameworks, “fawn” is commonly described alongside fight, flight, and freeze as a survival response rooted in trying to stay safe by appeasing others. This can also make sense through an attachment lens. When someone has learned that honesty, needs, or self-expression might lead to rejection, tension, or loss of connection, they can start prioritizing acceptance over authenticity. That’s often how people end up self-silencing without even realizing it. So the good news is... this is not just “your personality.” It is a pattern, which means it can be understood, worked with, and changed. And you’re in the right place for that. I’d also encourage you to check out some of my free past masterclasses on my website that I haven't moved over here yet that explain this a bit better and more in depth. Go to levelupwithrachel.com, click Courses, and then select 'Connected Body' – "Learn compassion for our triggers & reactions.” My site describes these resources as foundational tools for inner healing, emotional freedom, and self-love, which sounds very aligned with what you’re wanting to build. :) Glad you’re here, Dev.
18d •
Releasing the need to hold it all
A lot of people are carrying tension they don’t even realize they’re holding. In their shoulders. Their jaw. Their chest. Their stomach. They’re holding the day. Holding the pressure. Holding everyone else. Holding themselves together. And then wondering why they feel tired, edgy, disconnected, or like they can’t fully breathe. Today’s practice is about letting your body feel that it does not have to grip so hard. Today’s Somatic Reset (approx 3 minutes): Stand or sit with both feet flat on the ground. Let your spine be tall, but not stiff. Take one deep inhale through your nose. Exhale out of your mouth like you’re fogging up a mirror. Now bring awareness to these 4 places one by one: Your jaw Your shoulders Your chest Your belly For each area, gently tense it for 5 seconds.Then fully release. Jaw — clench, then soften. Shoulders — shrug them up, then drop them. Chest — tighten slightly, then let it open. Belly — brace, then let it go. After that, place one hand on your chest and one hand on your lower belly. Take 4 slow belly breaths. With each exhale, say quietly to yourself: I do not have to hold everything right now. On your final breath, let your shoulders drop again and soften your face. That’s it. Reflection: What are you unconsciously holding in your body today? What changes when you give yourself permission to soften, even for a moment?
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Mar 10 •
Coming Back Into Your Body Before You Speak
A lot of women don’t speak from truth. They speak from activation. They speak too fast. Over-explain. Shut down. Say “I’m fine” when they’re not. Not because they’re bad communicators. Because their body doesn’t feel safe yet. Today’s practice is about returning to your body before you respond, explain, or react. Today’s Somatic Reset (approx 3 minutes): Stand up and place both feet firmly on the ground.Bend your knees slightly so you’re not locking your legs. Place both hands on your thighs. Take a slow inhale through your nose.Then exhale out of your mouth with a sigh. Now gently press your hands into your thighs for 10 seconds.Release. Do that 3 times. As you press, think: I am here. I am safe in my body. I do not have to rush. Next, roll your shoulders back 5 times slowly. Then unclench your jaw and soften your tongue. Place one hand on your heart and one on your belly. Take 3 slow breaths and ask yourself: What am I actually feeling right now? What is actually true in this moment? What do I need before I speak? That’s it. Reflection: How often do you rush to respond before your body has even caught up?What shifts when you let yourself pause first?
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Mar 4 •
Check in
When something feels tense in a relationship, what’s your first instinct?
Poll
3 members have voted
1 like • Mar 5
@Barb Mahaffey thank you for sharing, I was/still kind of the same depending on who it is, how much sleep I've had, etc. The difference now is my awareness is much faster and have the tools to move through it quicker. 🙂
Mar 2 •
Movement Monday
Theme: Interrupting the Reactivity Loop When something triggers or upsets you, your body reacts before your mind does.If you don’t reset your body, you’ll try to solve an emotional reaction with logic and that’s where overthinking starts. Today’s Somatic Reset (approx 3 minutes): 1. Stand up or if in a seated position put both feet on the ground and sit up tall. 2. Close your eyes and take notice of how your body feels for 30 seconds. 3. Next, open your eyes if you want then shake your arms and shoulders for 30 seconds. 4. While doing this, exhale loudly through your mouth. 5. Place one hand on your chest, one on your lower belly. 6. Take 4 slow breaths in from your belly, longer exhale than inhale. 7. Relax your jaw consciously. That’s it. Take notice again of how your body feels. What difference do you feel in your body before vs. after?
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@rachel-beaudette-5077
I teach you how to turn conflict into connection through inner child awareness, repair skills, and emotional ownership.
Active 11h ago
Joined Aug 24, 2025