A while ago I burnt out. I don't talk about it much, but it's part of why I'm doing this now. The thing I learned: young people don't just need adults who care. They need adults who are okay. If you're running on empty, they feel it. On the touchline, at training, in the car. So if you give up your evenings and weekends for this, look after yourself too. It's not selfish. It's part of the job. No question this week. Just reply if this lands. Paul

Every coach has to do it. How you tell a young player they're not starting can matter more than the decision itself. A few things that help: Tell them before matchday, if you can. Finding out in front of everyone at kick-off is the hardest way. Tell them on their own. A quiet word, not an announcement to the group. Give them a reason and a role. "I'm starting you on the bench because I want fresh legs for the second half, and I want you ready to change the game." Leave out comparisons. "He's just better than you right now" stays with a young person far longer than you'd think. Quick one: when do you tell them, at training or on the day?

A month ago I started sharing again. Here are three things I’ve seen since. 1. Young people tell you more than you think, if you ask. One Scout wrote “a baddie” when asked what he sees in the mirror. Then he crossed it out and wrote “a kind person.” 2. Coaches want to talk about who they are, not just drills. Every coach in one session asked for a follow-up. 3. Parents want the same thing coaches do. The first parents on my course said it plainly: they want their young person to do well and enjoy it. Thanks for being here. Which one rings true at your club: 1, 2 or 3? Paul

Next time you're at training, watch who gets given the jobs. Who collects the bibs. Who puts the cones out. Who gets the captain's armband. To us, it's just getting things done. To the young people, it's a message about who's trusted. And the ones who are never asked notice, every single week. Rotating the jobs costs nothing. For some players, it might be the moment they feel part of the team. Quick one for you: A the same few usually do the jobs, or B you rotate them? Just reply A or B. Paul

Culture is built in the smallest moments. This week at my 7-year-old’s football training, the team were practising penalties. A few of the boys began chanting “miss, miss, miss” as their teammates stepped up to shoot. One boy missed… and walked away visibly upset. The coach addressed it immediately – as he should. But when my own son came off the pitch, I didn’t shout or label him as “naughty.” Instead, I asked him to step into the other boy’s shoes. “How would you feel if that was you?” “Sad.” “So how do you think he feels now?” “Sad.” “Is it kind to make someone feel sad?” “No.” “What’s the right thing to do?” “To say sorry.” So he did. Will he always get it right? No. Is he a bad kid? Absolutely not. He’s learning what good culture looks like. And this applies far beyond football fields. In families. In leadership. In teams. In business. Culture isn’t created by rules alone. It’s created by the identity we reinforce: “I am someone who takes responsibility.” “I am someone who considers others.” “I am someone who contributes positively.” That’s why goal setting that focuses only on targets often fails. Lasting change starts with identity. This is exactly what I’ll be teaching in my upcoming 3-part live series on goal setting around identity — how to build goals that align with who you are becoming, not just what you want to achieve. If you’re interested in building stronger habits, teams, or leadership from the inside out, I’d love for you to join. What culture are your actions quietly teaching others?