They're impossible to date (just messing with you!). Safe ones don't have drama with ex, don't have multiple fathers, and the kid(s) have a solid father figure, like a grandpa and she has very good relationships with immediate family. I let them know early that I cannot be their kid's father and see how readily they accept that. They also have had few relationships and the reason why they ended was clear (e.g., actual physical abuse, abandoned, or they're now a widow). They also manage their affairs well despite things being difficult for them (and they don't ask for $, and if they do, it's 6 mos - 1 year into the relationship and it's for something necessary, like medical or food - even better is when they have a need and they don't ask, but you notice it and can help them). If they divorced because "he didn't make me happy" (or she cheated), is inviting serious trouble into your life, plus that's not a legitimate divorce and I fear God too much to get involved with a woman like that. Lot's of tattoos in visible places, weird piercings, weird hair, revealing lots of skin on social media, male "best friends," and out of control, disrespectful kids are also serious red flags and I will not touch them.

The best ones have a very serious and sober Christian world view and reject feminism and yearn for male leadership and are very submissive - these are very hard to find. They also realize that bringing kids is most likely a burden to a man and are eager to make concessions and find ways to make themselves useful in your life because of that. The ones that expect you to fill the role of a father (in every aspect, especially financial) - I think are only interested in financial help. The stories I hear from other men who were expected to be fathers to another man's kids never end well.

Surprised at how multiple women approach continues to work and feels normal (and in scripture Ezekiel 23 / God had two wives: Israel & Judah, Matt 25 1 bridegroom & 10 virgins). Want to better understand money pill when convenient.

@Darwynn McPherson if convenient, yes, I would really like to see a draft, understanding more is changing my life.

Yes, more about obscuring our finances as Willie mentioned if possible, including things like real estate. E.g., do we put them in trusts or LLC that are owned but overseas trusts, etc.

Yes, that's it. it's rebellion condemned by the Lord. it's amazing how easily people are fooled by this notion. And older sanctimonious women in the church that grew up in the 60s support and encourage this evil notion in the younger ones (people foolishly look at these older mid-wit women as "wise" yet they do a lot of damage in the church). Had exposure to three of these ugly women in my situation - makes me think of the verse about how the sins of the parents visit the 3rd and 4th generation.

@Khalil Abdul-Malik Wow, I hope you are doing well, don't give up trying to get to the other side of the experience, I know it is really really hard, but you can make it.

Wish I roleplayed the divorce outcomes (it was so thoroughly immoral). The Lord still protected my ass from total loss and catastrophe, but what she did and the immorality that the state facilitates still stings.