I want to tell you about a fireplace. At home we heat our whole house with a wood-burning oven. And I learned something from it that changed how I throw parties. You can spend all night trying to light one single log. It barely catches. It smokes, it struggles, it dies out. You're working twice as hard for half the result. But put a second log criss-cross on top of the first, create that little pocket of energy and air between them, and suddenly the fire roars to life on its own. Something happens in the space between two logs that one alone could never create. That's a partnership. And it might be exactly what you're missing. Here's what I see all the time. Someone with real talent tries to do everything themselves. The date, the venue, the calls, the guest list, the money, the setup. All of it, alone. And they burn out fast, or never start, because the mountain looks impossible from where they're standing. After 22+ years I'm telling you... DO NOT DO IT ALONE. Not because you can't. Because it's simply better, and more fun, with two. But here's an angle most people never think about. Doing it with a partner isn't just about splitting the workload. Your own party is your best chance to BOND with someone. Think about it. When those movers and shakers show up... the ones with the energy, the ones pulling people toward them... that's your opening. Buy them a drink. Introduce them around to new people so they light up and remember you did that for them. Trade war stories. Get to know them, personally, right there in the room. Do you need a kick in the ass to figure that out? Come on now. This is the easy, fun part, and it's how you turn a guest into a real ally. And here's a pro move. Keep good notes on people. If someone's got a birthday coming up, figure out how you can celebrate them at one of your parties. You have a digital phone, right? Then you have no excuse not to remember the little things that make people feel special. That's how loyalty gets built.

Here is something I learned over 22 plus years that almost nobody starting out understands. The date is the weapon! Not the venue. Not the flyer. Not the DJ. The DATE!!!! Here is what I mean. When you lock a date early and you put it out into the world, something powerful happens. Word travels. Other organizers hear that YOU are throwing something big that weekend. And they back off. They start looking at OTHER dates, because they don't want to go head to head with you. That is YOU in the driver's seat. We used to do this on purpose in San Francisco. We planted our flag on a date, made it known, and the others stayed away from OUR day. .....*** Tip and a Big insight here... we even did that with our "regular" parties... WE did our parties ON FRIDAYS....so we Pre-Empted other people's Saturday parties.. more on that in another post... Not because we were bullies. But because we moved FIRST, and we moved with confidence. Now let me be straight with you. This works when you have the reputation to back it up. If you are just getting started, you may not be fully there yet. That is okay. But this is EXACTLY how you start to dominate a city. You claim the date, you commit out loud, and you build the name that makes people move around YOU. Here is the part most people miss. Moving first doesn't just scare off competition. It hands you the best PARTNERS. Think about it. When you reach out to the strongest promoters and co-hosts in your city 4, 5, 6 months out, they haven't planned their fall yet. Their calendar is open. Their crowd is unclaimed. You get to them BEFORE anyone else does. So instead of fighting them for the same crowd, you invite them into YOUR room. Everybody wins, and the room is bigger than anything you could have built alone. Wait until three weeks out? Every good partner in the city is already booked or building their own thing. You get the leftovers. Now here is why I am telling you this TODAY. Halloween is coming!!! It is the single biggest night of the year for a party organizer.

Here's a lie I want to pull out of your head right now. ...."I can't throw a real party because I don't know enough people." Completely false. And I'm going to prove it. You already know more than enough people to fill a room. And every one of them knows people YOU don't know. That right there is the most powerful guest list on earth... the friends-of-friends effect... and almost nobody uses it on purpose. Let me break it down. Say you personally know 30 or 40 people you could reach out to. Feels small, right? Watch this. You don't just invite those 40. You invite them and you ask each one to bring a friend or two. Now 40 becomes 80. It becomes 120. And the friends they bring don't feel sold to. They're just hearing "you have to come to this" from someone they already trust. No ad budget buys that. But here's where most people stop, and this is the part that separates a hobbyist from a real organizer. When those friends-of-friends show up at your party... WORK THE ROOM. I mean it. Don't stand behind the bar or remain seated at your VIP Table with your buddies. … NO, NO…NOOO… Get out there and connect with the new faces. And as you do, watch closely. The movers and shakers are easy to spot. You can tell by their energy, by how they mingle, by how a little crowd naturally forms around them. Those are your targets. Make friends with THEM. Personally. Because now you're in the driver's seat. You're no longer depending on someone else to invite them back next time. You've got the direct line yourself. And obviously, while they're there, you need a way to collect their info. There are some slick tricks to that, and I'll get into the tools another time. Just know this... a great night with no way to reach those people again is a night half wasted. Tip for success: Take some pix with You and them AND Them and Their Friends…and tell them you will put it on the Slides / Photo Page that always get publisized after the party… ....usually within 24 hours OR sooner… ...People LOVE to check the Party pix out AFTER a party..

I just wanted to let @Alf Marcussen that you have sparked something in me to rekindle my IRLs and starting a virtual each month starting in Sept. Stay tuned on the process and the achievements I believe the more we connect In person will grow a business fastest. No matter how much you spend on ads the people you will have in front of you will help tremendously with retention and with that money stays consistent! More to come!

Let me tell you the real reason your first party hasn't happened yet. It's not the venue. It's not the money. It's not that you don't know enough people. It's that you're waiting to feel ready..... no S**T! And after 22+ years of throwing parties in San Francisco, I'm here to tell you... you're never going to feel ready. Not on your first one. Not on your fiftieth. So you might as well start now. Now let me clear something up, because people get this wrong about me. When I put that first bus together for a concert, I didn't cross my fingers and hope people showed up. I made sure they showed up. I worked it. I knew exactly who I was calling, in what order, and what I needed locked down in advance. That's why one bus became eight. That's why fifty people became 400 in Spanish hats at the Greek Theater. That wasn't luck. That was a system. And you can learn it!!!! Here's the thing about "waiting to be ready." It's fear wearing a costume. It dresses up as being responsible. "I'll do it once I have the perfect venue." "I'll do it once I understand the numbers." But six months from now you'll just have a new excuse, and the date will still be empty. So let me give you the antidote, and it starts with a decision, not a feeling. Pick a date. Two or three weeks out. Not the perfect date. A date. Then here's how the pros mobilize people. You don't fire off a group text and pray. You get on the phone and you CALL your top 20 people. One by one. Real voice, real energy. "Hey, I'm putting something together on the 19th, and I want you there. Can you bring a couple people?" THEN, after the call, you follow up with a text so it's locked in writing. Call first. Text second. In that order. That's not old-fashioned. That's what actually works, and there's no shortcut around it. Promotion has never had a shortcut, and it never will. The first event doesn't have to be big. It doesn't have to be polished. It doesn't even have to make money. It just has to happen, because everything you want... the profit, the reputation, the network... lives on the OTHER side of it.