@Toms Astahovskis here’s my story(dictated by my fingers rather than my voice, actually, don’t ask 😜): i spent much of my early 20s and late teens itching to know who i am and the deeper nature of reality. i read any number of books, watched videos, even sought out psychedelic experiences (and books concerning psychedelic experiences). one on such occasion, i really went out of my way to secure mushrooms, acid, DMT…something! i had what i felt were all of the proper settings: shitty motel in Studio City, California, a known drug-dealer in the upstairs suites, a pocketful of money supplied by an enabling friend, naked determination and pure enthusiasm. still i was unable to secure any psychedelics. i was actually given a fake substance, whatever it was - i don’t know. i remember declining a trip to a friendly, luxurious alcoholic rehabilitation center because, no, “I’m going to meet God!” so we fast forward just 3 years. without the need for an external substance, books, (maybe some videos - but not really), i finally know who i am. that pure Awareness, pure Perception, Awareness/Perception just one thing, just That. existence itself, love itself, joy itself, pure knowing: i am the living script. every time i reached for something outside of myself, i was as a dog chasing its own tail. to this day ive never touched a psychedelic and if i ever do - my intentions surrounding the experience would be very diffferent i imagine. anyway, there’s my story. i’ve chosen a slightly different thread than what i initially planned 😜

@Toms Astahovskis why not ask like back then? oh i did, i actually went upstairs and knocked myself and his wife answered and was very upset and i didn’t understand why or the social rituals around it 😂 i was basically like, “Hi, I’m Martia! i’d like to purchase illegal stuff from you! 😃” 😂😂😂 people always thought i was a “narc” lolol probably because of how young i look/looked. do i believe in coincidence? do you know that line from the dark knight rises(i think)? “you’re a detective, you aren’t allowed to believe in coincidences anymore.” 😝 i don’t think so. my imagination creates/outpictures as my experience. the Big “I” or me beyond the storyline intended for me to discover my true nature in a different way. plus, it’s interesting how i pursued alcohol and was always able to procure it even when flat broke (but couldn’t get my hands on shrooms even when overflowing with cash) it’s really funny. i think i put the whole psychedelic experience on a pedestal of sorts too.

@Toms Astahovskis star wars 😛😄

favourite book: Paulo Coehlo’s The ‘Alchemist’ movie: State Fair (1945) or My Dear Secretary (1948) travel destination: wow just one??? denmark 🇩🇰

hi pretty people! 🩵 1. i’m from Virginia, USA 2. i do nothing for a living 😆 3. i’m passionate specifically about flow and presence-based living, manifestation, the nature of reality, music + songwriting 4. fun fact about me…eRMMM, i play the alto saxophone and speak spanish, portuguese (maybe not so well anymore, but at one point decently) 5. my biggest ambition is to do life my way