As salaamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh dear sister, I can understand where you are coming from when it comes to this question. Taking halaal and reputable means which are available to us in our time to achieve what would please Allah would not only be Islamically sound, but it is recommended to do so. We can recall the hadith about tying one's camel and placing trust in Allah. Taking means does not 'get in the way' of destiny. Allah loves that we seek out the good He created for good purposes and that we put our efforts in so He will reward us generously. No matter what, Allah can give you however He wants. We have to be careful of placing limits on the way we would accept something we receive from Allah i.e. if he sends it to us in a particular way. A question to think about is, what is the reason why you may consider waiting for someone to be sent? Consider: If you wait at home for someone to be sent to you, wouldn't there end up being an interaction between you and them? In that case, wouldn't they end up hearing your voice and seeing what you would normally allow in front of a non-mahram? There would have to be a level of interaction. You would have to ask questions to make sure they actually are a good fit. You would have to be careful of jumping into it without proper vetting simply because this person came to you in a way that you were hoping. Consider alternatively, if you were to go to an in-person match-making event which followed Islamic guidelines, then the ones you talk to, what you wear etc. are all choices you can make without compromising Islam and you would be putting your efforts in somewhere which is catered to the exact purpose you are there for and it would make sense to do so. Whatever the suitable means to seek out something, we should exert some efforts into it inshaaAllah. Al-Ghazali RH reported: Umar, may Allah be pleased with him, said, “Let not one of you refrain from working for his provision, supplicating to Allah to provide while he knows that the sky does not rain gold and silver.”

@Layan B Beautiful Allahummabarik <3

Alhamdullillah I feel like I transitioned more from the mindset of "I'll take it by ear when I am in the situation/meeting" to putting in work to compose thoughtful questions and hopefully improve on them inshaaAllah Also hearing from the wonderful sisters helps me adjust and reconsider different viewpoints alhamdullillah

Where is @Rayyah A ? Sis I miss your insights Allahummabarik havent heard from you in a while!

@Layan B Yesss I agree! Love the "I think the difference for me is that I can accept where someone is right now if I can see the character, mindset, and drive that tell me where they’re going." Its the effort Safety is huge

@Samira B I thought similarly as well! Even though we may not see the full 'how' and we put in our efforts, that's okay because that is only in Allah's hands! He can put things together and make things work that we didn't even imagine or know we would need! Ask for everything you want and need sis without restriction, Allah is capable of it all! There is no such thing as too much when asking Allah!

@Habibatul Aulia Yesss, their presence is missed! Where are you guys ??

@Habibatul Aulia mashaaAllah, very interesting!