Hello beautiful woman in Christ! For me at the end of 2024 I feel like I tripped and stumbled in January and I never quite caught my balance all the way until December. This has been the most emotional year for me when it comes to my children in my household, the situations with family, and also life lessons in relationships. But I have never quite felt as close to God in a real way. Like a raw naked realness. A vulnerability to God instead of to a man. I am a mother of four children, three boys, and one girl as you know, they all have their own fathers. When I was running the course of life after I had my first in a domestic violence relationship, I was traumatized and sought after companionship until this year, that’s 15 years. Currently when it comes to dating at 34 years old, I am uninterested in any man that can’t entertain the idea of prayer being the first medicine. I have spent 15 years dealing with four different individuals and some in between that lack in prayer and when I combine myself with these people, I too start lacking in prayer. After 15 years of doing the same thing, I have taken a different control of my body, my mind and my spirit, and I have given my hands up to the Lord‘s mercy. The crazy part is the walk being more difficult on earth than doing things the wrong way, and entertaining toxicity in any shape and form. Now dating, I am blunt. I am prioritizing my personal growth before growth with anyone else which means that I don’t have the same time and availability. I’ve learned when I’m dealing with the wrong man. I’m either taking care of him and I already have four children, whether it be mentally or at times financially to be honest. I also tend to replace God’s presence with a man’s presence, which means now I can’t be surrounded by the wrong spirit for long. I am forthcoming about my walk with God and what I desire for myself and my children, which also makes me unavailable to the wrong individuals. So although it’s not easy, it feels better. And I know as I continue to move forward in Christ it gets greater later.