I had a call this week with a client who has been married for 33 years. That's 33 years! Think about that. Not 3. Not 13. Thirty-three years with the same woman, and he is still learning how to stand in front of her without flinching. His wife is a strong, fiery Latina. She loves him deeply, accepts him for who he is, and has stood beside him through everything. She is also, by his own description, relentless. She pokes. She pushes. She tests. She nags, and she prods, and she turns up the heat until he either holds his ground or goes looking for an exit. And here is the part we are working on: he goes looking for the exit every time. He withdraws. He shrinks. He reverts into what I call "little boy energy," and he disappears emotionally from the room, from the conversation, and from her. The very thing she is craving from him, he cannot give her in those moments. And the more he shrinks, the more she pushes. And the more she pushes, the more he shrinks. It is a cycle that is slowly strangling the intimacy out of a marriage that was built to last. He is not alone in this. Not even close. Nearly every man I coach is navigating some version of this exact dynamic. Strong woman. High-achieving man. Beautiful life on paper but underneath it all, a quiet erosion of polarity, attraction, and masculine presence that nobody is talking about at the dinner table. She Is Not The Problem I want to be clear about something before we go any further. His wife is not attacking him. She is not trying to humiliate him, manipulate him, or win some power struggle. What she is doing, at the deepest level, is asking a question. The same question strong women have always asked of the men they love. Are you still there? Are you solid? Can I let go and trust that you will hold this? A fiery woman does not soften for a man who melts. She is not wired that way. Her big energy, her fire, her push, that is not a character flaw. It is the natural expression of a woman who has been forced to carry more than her share, and whose nervous system has never been given a reason to stand down.

I have to be straight up with you, I was not on board with Vancouver's being one of the Canadian cities to host the world cup. The outrageous expense and costs of prepping and hosting these games push the bill to near $1Billion. It's a financial legacy that could haunt the city for years to come. In fact, many hotels and venues were beginning to squirm with below 60% vacancy rates and poor ticket sales due to exorbitant prices. However, since the games started last week and event leading up to Canada's crushing win yesterday, Vancouver has been more alive than when we hosted the Olympics in 2010. The whole world is here and also watching. The city and surrounding areas are packed with tourists and game enthusiast. This is on par with the Calgary Stampede and the infectious city vibe that it has. I predict that Vancouver's net gain from this will be incredible. Showcasing the Jewel of the West Coast in all its splendour with incredible weather does not hurt either. I say all this because I was wrong to prejudge a situation. Plus, I also didn't see it succeeding. I didn't think many international fans would come. But have they ever! So it goes to show you that things can work out in spite of the pessimism and down playing I got caught up in. I'm glad I am wrong. I am happy for Vancouver, the fans, the businesses, and the legacy that will come from this. Where else can I see more optimism in my life? Where else could I be wrong about my outlook, and instead see the good that's possible? Have a Remarkable weekend Brother! Coach Dwayne

She's Not Going Cold...She's Responding to You! At some point in your marriage, something shifted. She stopped reaching for you and the conversations got shorter, the intimacy dried up, and you've been trying to figure out what the hell you did wrong. Here's the truth most men don't want to hear. She didn't pull away from you, she pulled away from the man you stopped being. Women don't suddenly go cold randomly, they respond to what they feel, and what she's been feeling is a man who's been managing the situation instead of leading it. Keeping the peace instead of holding your ground makes you slowly disappear while still showing up physically. She can't always put her finger on it, but she feels it, and her pulling away is her response to it. Sit with that for a second. 3 Ways to Turn It Around: 1. Stop chasing her approval and start holding your own - Every time you shrink to manage her mood, you confirm what she's already sensing and that destroys the certainty and the safety she needs from you. A man who stands in his conviction even when she's uncomfortable is a man she can feel again. 2. Lead something - That's right! Pick one area of your life or your home and lead it decisively. Without asking for permission. Leadership isn't loud, it's consistent, and she's watching for it. 3. Get back in your own life - What did you used to care about before the relationship became your entire identity? You have to get back to your purpose, your friendships, and your edge. A man with a life of his own is infinitely more magnetic than a man whose world revolves around his wife's happiness. She doesn't need more effort from you. She needs more you. Drop a comment below. Where do you recognize yourself in this? You've got this! Be Remarkable! -Coach Dwayne

Have you ever been slammed with a cold, illness, or injury and felt guilty for taking time off or surrendering to it to heal and get better? I am going through that today. Got a bad head cold and thought I'd push through and get some things done that need to get done. But as I sit here in the coffee shop and blow my constantly running nose and sneeze intermittently, I realize I am not as creative or as present as I need to be. (Plus, I am sure I am not popular with the customers). As a result I have not been as focused or as effective as I should be. I have to follow my own teachings and surrender to it from a higher perspective. I've had a pretty rough month as my Step mom is in hospital with a brain bleed and rapidly declining mental capacity. She won't be coming home and needs to go to a nursing home for the rest of her days. which we don't think will be long. Plus, I am taking care of my 91 year old dad and helping my him navigate these difficult and uncertain waters. I'll have to get him into a retirement home soon as he can't be left on his own for long. So I think the stress of everything has lowered my immune system and wanting me to take some time to rest and relax and stop the constant "doing". That's hard for me as I am focused on a few tangents on the business front. But rest I must, or I an sense the Universe is going to create something much louder for me to pay attention to. If you are going though some health issues or tough times. It might be a sign to breathe, slow down and take stock of where you are at. Sure, you can try to "hustle" your way through it, but the body is a wonderful machine and it will let you know when you are running on empty. Pay attention to it so you are not left having to stall-out...or worse. It's okay. You'll recalibrate and come back even stronger soon enough. As soon as I press "Post", I'm going home and taking the rest of the day to look after myself, and trust that everything is perfectly timed and that I can also invite some ease and grace into the equation.

On this Fearless Friday, I want you to consider the maxim "finish The Week Strong" from a deeper perspective. This is not about grinding and hustling to get more done or to try and catch up on a lack-lustre week in a few hours. As you know, that rarely gets you the prize you truly want. Instead, I want you to step into the Remarkable Man that you really are. Finish strong in the man you know you need to be. I'm talking about the essence of him. Feel his power, his resolve, his passion, his dreams, his hopes, his heart. Feel all of it. That's the "strong" I am wanting you to embody as you finish your Friday. Breathe him in, change your physiology to match the dynamic range of energy he possesses. What will you do to create alignment with THAT man? Now...What is he capable of doing today that's going to make you feel strong? That's your task today! Let's go! You've got this! Be Remarkable! Coach Dwayne