I hope everyone is having a great start to their Friday. This week has been a tough one for me. Last weekend I went home to visit family and for the past year and a bit I've been dealing with the decline of life with someone very close to me. This person is like a second father to me, allows me to feel very safe, they are very nurturing and they hold a very special place in my heart. When I was visiting them last weekend I experienced them nearing what I thought was the end of their life and then the next day coming back to life with full clarity. It's being very emotional for me and a lot of ups and downs with not knowing if I was saying goodbye or when they would be ready to go. There's a lot to this story, but I had my monthly sound bath event on Monday and it was heart focused with more than half of the room being people that I knew and I felt so loved. I also felt my heart chakra feel much lighter and just super loved. And then the emotions from then till last night kept going up and down leading to last night- my second sound bath event of the week. Again, a lot of heart chakra energy was in the space, and I left with my right arm completely dead weight. Now I have such an intense stiffness in my neck down my shoulder and somewhat in my arm still, which I know is my heart chakra. Basically, one day I feel happy and positive and the next day is not so much. I'm trying to give myself Grace, and to sit with everything I am feeling.. the toughest thing to wrap ones head around is the battle of experiencing the joy in my life and abundance but also feeling sad while feeling those things too. Hard balance.

And I know my right side is masculine. ( Which leads me back to a caregiving role and feeling like I should be there to help, which is why I believe I have this stiffness)

Spot on!

@Pamela Maze I agree!

I feel open to sharing. I didn't share this last night in the course because I wanted to sit with it longer and journal more in depth. - I have this business opportunity that would be a weaved extension off of my business. I knew I wanted to invest into it right after Christmas, I was excited and felt aligned and then I had a lot of family health things going on and I lost that momentum that I originally had with it. It's a larger investment, so I'm sure that has something to do with it. Fear of success/lack of mindset creeping back in. I journaled last night and realized that it feels like fear "ego" is trying to crawl back in to cover my intuition and alignment because it wants to keep me "safe" and secure. This opportunity would be leaping into the unknown, which my higher self is telling me to do, but my ego is trying to tell me other wise. I have told myself to surrender atm and allow clarity to be regained again once its the right time. I am not investing into something that I feel "obligated" to do so or that I'm questioning. I want it to feel like a soft, firm YES.

@Aimee Fawcett Thank you for this <3