Reading Shanlee’s story about her travels with Asteri, I was reminded just how powerful and sacred these moments of connection and co-regulation truly are. My story follows a different path, but the heart of it is the same—a deep longing for presence, for reunion, and for the kind of love that grounds us all back into the present moment. For the past two months, I had been away in Alaska, working and living further from Shanlee and Asteri than I ever had before. As the days ticked by, the anticipation of seeing them grew, but as fate would have it, our return flights overlapped in such a way that I was set to miss them by hours—just as they were flying out to Oregon, I would be coming home to an empty house. The thought of missing them tugged at me, so I let my excitement and longing guide me toward a new possibility: what if I could find a way to see them, even if just for a fleeting moment before their flight? Tapping into the memory of how Shanlee once surprised me with the news of Asteri’s existence, I wanted to mirror that magic and create a moment we’d all remember. With the universe’s unexpected cooperation, everything fell into place—a miracle of timing, covered shifts, and a last-minute red-eye flight. When I landed in Grand Junction, I watched as our red truck, Ruby, circled the parking lot. I stood waiting, heart pounding, at the end of the row, ready to surprise them. When Shanlee and her sister spotted me, their expressions were pure shock—like seeing a ghost. It was a reminder that life’s most real moments often jolt us awake, a break from the stories we tell ourselves about how things “should” be. But the most profound moment came with Asteri. She wasn’t expecting me; in her mind, I was still far away or living inside a screen. When she saw me, she looked away, overwhelmed—her whole nervous system flooded with disbelief. Instead of joy, she was frightened and dysregulated, calling out for “momma.” Instantly, I felt my own fears and insecurities bubble to the surface. Was she afraid of me? Would she want to see me? Would she ever warm up to me again? I took a deep breath, grounded myself in the present, and realized—this was my own inner child’s fear speaking, not just Asteri’s. I wanted to reach out and comfort her, but I knew the best thing I could do was to give her space and let Shanlee support her, as I cared for my inner child.

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