I have spent the last 8 hours (at least) beating myself up for not being more productive today. For not getting more done. For being lazy. But the fact of the matter is, I have been completely distracted. I called the vet first thing this morning because late in the day yesterday I found a lump on Puck's side. It is not insignificant. I have been with this veterinary clinic for more than 20 years and they have always been very responsive. Today, not so much. I was on call, waiting the whole day to run him over there to find out everything is ok (crossed fingers). Maybe doing my best today was not about powering through. It was not about getting it all done and making the changes I need to. Maybe today the magick was petting my cat, making sure he is not in pain, monitoring his appetite and energy and just being. I find it difficult to ever give myself that grace, but I do today because right now I am scared, I am feeling helpless and the most important thing in my life is a soul that only has me to care for him. Puck Yeah